Friday, 6 March 2015

It Follows - The scoop and digest

Low budget scarefests often outclass their big budget counterparts and after 2010 comedy/drama debut The Myth of the American Sleepover, David Robert Mitchell's teen horror hopes to continue the trend.

Before coming to UK cinemas in 2013, home invasion thriller You're Next left its gory mark on film festivals in 2011.  Similar story here, as this first premiered at Cannes last year.

Plot details and/or spoilers will run rabbit run.

Feeling the force:

Maika Monroe - Jay
Keir Gilchrist - Paul
Daniel Zovatto - Greg
Jake Weary - Hugh

A random girl is clearly terrified by 'something' and is murdered (off camera) on the beach.

Sometime later, young hottie Jay dates Hugh who complains of seeing an invisible woman at a theatre.

They go at it in a car but Hugh chloroforms conquest and ties her to a wheelchair.

Regaining consciousness, he drops the bombshell that meat injection has passed on a curse that gives licence for a supernatural being to relentlessly pursue at walking pace.  It can assume the guise of anything human and is only visible to the cursed.  If the 'jinxed' is killed, the monster will stalk the previous carrier.

Unlucky babe.  You've contracted a STC.

What's that I hear you cry? Well it's a sexually transmitted 'curse' of course.

God I'm funny.

Having evaded its first appearance of a naked woman, Hugh safely delivers Jay back home and doesn't wait for a snog goodnight.

The equation is simple - open legs quicker than a broken lock and pass it on.

After Jay witnesses various sightings, her friends start to believe this bitch ain't crazy.

They attempt to track down Hugh but only find a fake address.  Still, finding a gun is always handy...

School records come up trumps and reveal Hugh's real address.  During a chat, his actual name is Geoff and/or Jeff.

Without subtitles, who knows?

Sod it.  Let's refer to him as Geoff.

Anyway, he 'acquired' the curse from a one night stand.

On the beach, it takes the form of girl chum Yara and although shot, soon recovers.

Jay bails in terror and crashes into a corn field.

At the hospital, she does the business with Greg and curse adopts a new bearer.

After another 'Greg' breaks into his house, Jay's attempt to warn prove fruitless when mum has sex with him.

Wrong on all levels.

So, back to you Jay.

Paul offers to relieve the burden from childhood sweetheart but she refuses.

The remainder hatch a cunning plan to deep fry the entity with various electrical appliances by luring it inside an abandoned swimming pool.

Posing as father, the approach of throwing whatever at Jay is mildly unexpected.

Jay provides location and a couple of headshots from Paul's gun seals the deal.

Closer examination reveals the entity has expanded into a mass of blood.

Paul earns his reward and realises sexual ambition.

The ending is left ambiguous because either Paul goes with a prostitute or retains the curse, as somebody follows while holding hands with presumably now girlfriend Jay.

I'm perched upon on a certain fence because while this was pretty decent, I expected much more.

Performances are competent, the idea is well executed and old fashioned jump tactics sometimes deliver.

Unfortunately, whether screaming, blank-faced or starkers, malevolence is more ordinary than a seven day week.

Like entity, I pissed myself when The Exorcist was ripped off.  Oh yeah, Olivia did the same in Evil Dead 2013.

As plot holes gape, we're forced to draw our own conclusions.

We 'assume' GFB (girl from beginning) was Geoff's one night stand and because sex tig wasn't played, is why curse reverted back to him.

Hang on a mo, saying he caught shit from 'her' is bollocks because she never had it in the first place.

In other words - who slept with Jeff?

Yeah, it makes no fucking sense.

Barring a highly unlikely prequel, the origin of curse and how it came about remains a ridiculous mystery.

At least Stephen King's Thinner (novel or awful film adaptation) and Sam Raimi's disappointing Drag Me to Hell made no secret of dealing with gypsy curses.

Presence, force, entity or whatever your preference is portrayed as a relentless terminator.

Being able to imitate object of equal size, but without the need of sampling physical contact smacks of a supernatural T-1000.

As it only 'meanders', this also reminds of Mr. X from Resident Evil 2, not to be confused with the almost boring Nemesis rehash.

Amnesia: The Dark Descent contained shocks aplenty, but most terrified when encountering invincible and invisible force the 'Shadow', that hunts and kills anybody who doesn't respect or abuses power of the Orb.

Think about it geezers and divas...

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