Thursday, 7 May 2015

Unfriended - The scoop and digest

To most, social networking is like oxygen - we can't live without it.

So-called 'cyber' thrillers are ten a penny but unlike Chatroom (which makes watching paint dry seem exciting), Panic Button is worth clicking out.

Want to know why Smiley was given the time of day?

I did it for lulz.

Found footage is given fresh impetus as fear is literally posted online.

Virus free or corrupted hard drive?

Let's logon.

Plot details and/or spoilers will appear in multiple windows.

Downloading cast data...

Shelley Hennig - Blaire
Will Peltz - Adam
Renee Olstead - Jess
Jacob Wysocki - Ken
Moses Jacob Storm - Mitch
Courtney Halverson - Val

In Fresno, California, Laura Barns committed suicide due to receiving relentless online abuse after the posting of a Youtube video.

Basically, she got absolutely smashed at a party and fouled herself.

Childhood friend Blaire watches her death on 'Broadcast Yourself' but is interrupted by video call from boyfriend Mitch.

Smoking Ken, gun-toting Adam and juicy Jess soon hook up and gristle is chewed over teenage shit chat.

However, faceless account billie227 raises eyebrows.

Messages sent from Laura's Facebook begin to increasingly disturb and when Blaire tries to 'unfriend' the account, chat-crasher isn't impressed.

Chat-crasher? I like it.

They invite and accuse the unpopular Val of pranking them, which of course she denies.

Despite using every cyber trick in the book, they can't get rid; so Val calls 911 to report electronic abuse.

Val's video feed cuts out and she reappears in a catatonic state.

The law arrives and scanner code 10-56 reveals cause of death was suicide.

We are led to believe that downing a bottle of bleach was against her will.

Could a supernatural and malevolent force be responsible?

(Shrugs shoulders).

Ignoring warnings from 'Laura', Ken takes the bull by the bollocks and emails each user Trojan Horse software hoping to remove vicious troll.

Get the fuck in there because it's gone, but like a persistent bad penny...

Perspective now switches to Ken's room and after locating the video's source behind lattice, he's not alone.

'Blending' in with electrical appliance ends interest.

The gang are forced to play a game of Never Have I Ever, with death going to the loser.

For the benefit of those who care, Would You Rather was made into pretty impressive torture porn.

Anyway, Laura assumes the role of quizmaster and dark revelations amongst friends force the truth will out.

Blaire cheated on Mitch with Adam and after philanderers receive messages on respective printers, Mitch practically explodes.

It was one night and didn't mean anything.  Whatever.  Spare us the bullshit BITCH!

'If you reveal this note, Adam will die'.

Blaire buckles under pressure from Mitch to produce paper and Adam turns his gun on himself.

His print-out read the same, but would kill Blaire instead.

Jess can't take this shit anymore and locks herself in the bathroom.

Like that's gonna do any good.

Sure enough, the poor cow is soon choking on smouldering curling tongs.

Laura posts evidence with the caption of 'Looks like she finally STFU'.

Don't know what means? Shut the fuck up!

And then there were two.

Blaire gives Mitch up over who posted the video in the first place and large knife quickly gives him the point.

Laura uploads the 'unedited' video showing Blaire as camerawoman.

We knew that from the bastard beginning...

Can Laura forgive and forget? She doesn't stand a ghost of a chance.

Laptop is closed and Laura provides stock jump scare.

Verdict? Pretty good.

It's your typical teen slasher, but the concept of e-communication is well executed.

Despite dissolving into predictability, I wouldn't be at all surprised if a spate of cheap straight to DVD rip offs surface.

In principle, the similarities with Jon Wright's 2009 BBC funded British thriller Tormented is a strange coincidence.

Darren Mullet (Calvin Dean) is bullied until he committed suicide but death doesn't stop him exacting bloody revenge on his tormentors.

Even if you've never seen it, that should be enough to have heads nodding in agreement.

Aside from head honcho Bradley (Adam Pettyfer), Peter Amory (better known as wheelchair-condemned Chris Tate of Emmerdale fame) also stars in relative, but impressive obscruity.

Summing up, Leban Gabriadze's viral flick is clichéd, threatens to irritate and never frightening; but importantly - massively watchable.

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