Schwarzenegger funnies!

It's the turn of everybody's favourite Austrian action man.

I have to remind you Sully, this is my weak arm.

The ecstasy of wearing a tee is overwhelming.  I cannot begin to understand what the fuck is going on here.

Never mind about your physique or the interview love, let's have a look at your tits.

Don't stop there Grace and if you play your cards right, I have a different kind of stick you can hold...

Behold, the meeting of three legendary fossils.

Despite the millions I have, money can't buy you suitable organ enhancement. 

Starring in these types of shit fests has finally driven me insane. 

Thank goodness for 1996 because back then, I could still comfortably carry two gun props.

Arrrrggggghhhhhh!  Why can a bunch of kids act better than me?

Clinton, when you've done your thing - you're terminated asshole.

It's so hard to disguise utter contempt for such embarrassment.   Deep down, I reckon Sly would really love to stick a real one on him.

Arnie and Bruce still thought it was amusing for Sly to reiterate the fact that his party sausage still hasn't grown...

Sly was excited at the news that Arnie had agreed to reimagine and/or reboot Over the Top as Rick Zumwalt rejected The Expendables 3.

Ben Richards looks in a bit of discomfort as a travelling matte image

Top tip - staring at a knife will not intimidate steel.

Hmmmm, I like the look of this.

On second thoughts...

You'll pay for that you bastard as this helmet has left me feeling horny.

Matrix, here's your pay cheque.  Thanks Cindy, this should cover a replacement shirt.

He didn't take the news of 'boys have a penis, girls have a vagina' very well.

Arnie will find it less painful acting with Jesse Ventura in Predator 

Richards, I love the saw but I like gritting my teeth better.

Dangling from a chopper is so much fun...

Looking calm and comfortable for the camera.

Sorry Ben, you get to travel second class, what d'yer think?

You cold-blooded bastard, I'll tell you what I think of it.  I live to see you eat that contract.  But I hope you leave enough room for my fist, because I'm going to ram it into your stomach and break your goddamn spine.

You look pissed Ben, believe me you've got every right to be.  But ICS operate a complaints procedure and they make excellent toilet paper. 

Complaint?  What the fuck is a complaint?

Which sick asshole invited Pamela Anderson?

What a fine specimen ladies.  Do I hear ten?  Twenty?

Listen you old cow, a peck and no tongues. 

Ooooohhhhh matron, the auction is closed as this beef is mine.

Ben, I can't remember my next line, can you help me out?

The heavy burden of losing my virginity has been lifted but if my unfortunate lover had seen my 'satisfaction', she wouldn't be screaming "I'll be back!"  

Hey Danny, isn't it fucking hilarious taking a piss?  Not really, I'm just reading about a sex line for Hobbits.

Not that way you imbecile...

It's this fucking way.

The camouflage proved to be more attractive than first thought.

Awww, he needs a shirt to protect his shoulder from a prop that weighs less than the average paper bag.  What a pussy!

The make-up department succeeded in making him more attractive.

Having an unworthy skull is more useful than a four-leaf clover.

How dare you give me Sully's false leg. 

Arnie will be back for more.