Sunday, 7 September 2025

The Conjuring: Last Rites - The scoop and digest

Set up by the mid-credits scene in The Nun II (that used footage cut from previous entry The Devil Made Me Do It), what is reportedly the last entry in long-running franchise is written by Ian Goldberg, Richard Naing and David Leslie Johnson-McGoldrick and directed by series veteran Michael Chaves.

The Smurl case was first dramatized in 1991 TV movie The Haunted, starring Stephen Markle and Diane Baker as Ed and Lorraine respectively.

For shiggles, an unrelated film of same name was released in 2018.

Vera Farmiga - Lorraine Warren
Patrick Wilson - Ed Warren
Mia Tomlinson - Judy Warren
Ben Hardy - Tony
Rebecca Calder - Janet Smurl
Elliot Cowan - Jack Smurl
Kila Lord Cassidy - Heather Smurl
Beau Gadsdon - Dawn Smurl

Summary

In April 1964, Ed and a pregnant Lorraine are investigating an antique mirror at a curio shop.  Upon touching it, the mirror cracks and seemingly awakens a demonic entity, causing Lorraine to go into labour.

At the hospital, she gives birth to Judy who is initially stillborn, but survives.

1986.

West Pittston, Pennsylvania.

For her confirmation ceremony, Heather Smurl is gifted the same mirror from 22 years prior.

A series of paranormal events occur, prompting Heather and her sister Dawn to get rid.

When object is crushed inside a garbage truck the following morning, Dawn violently vomits blood and pulls a shard of glass from her mouth.

After Father Gordon dies, Judy has a vision, leading her to the Smurl house.

The Warrens show up to save the day.

Post-credits

As Judy marries Tony, among the guests are people from the Warrens' past cases, including Carolyn Perron (Lili Taylor), Janet Hodgson (Madison Wolfe) and David Glatzel (Julian Hilliard).

Lucy Locket lost her pocket

Low expectations were met, and then some.

Nothing really happens until the final 20 minutes, leaving us to endure a desperately drab family drama.

Unnamed demon subjugates three spirits to torment the Warrens and Smurls.

A grinning hag, her volatile daughter and an axe-wielding hillbilly, who murdered both in the house when he discovered his wife was having an affair.

Although manifestations of the demon appear (such as a giant Annabelle and the darkness which kills Father Gordon), we never see its true self.

Judy witnesses an apparition of Annabelle sitting in a rocking chair, freaking her out.  However, an engagement ring from Tony instantly erases such trauma.

Her reaction is just stupid.

During last knockings, a possessed Judy does some Carrie shit and throws the Smurl dog against a wall.

Trust me, it's unintentionally hilarious.

Using the power of love (a force from above), the Warrens vigorously chant prayers, shattering the mirror and destroying the demon.

If this really is the end, series bows out with a whimper.

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