Sunday 23 June 2024

Something in the Water - The scoop and digest

Hayley Easton Street's feature-length directorial debut is written by Cat Clarke.

Hiftu Quasem - Meg
Natalie Mitson - Kayla
Nicole Rieko Setsuko - Cam
Lauren Lyle - Lizzie
Ellouise Shakespeare-Hart - Ruth
Gabriel Prevost-Takahashi - Dominic

Summary

One year after Kayla and Meg were assaulted by homophobes, they, along with other friends Ruth and Cam, head to the Caribbean for Lizzie's wedding.

Before she marries Dominic, bridezilla and co take a motorboat to an isolated island for one final blowout.

While in shallow water, Ruth's leg is badly bitten by a shark and panic ensues.

After boat is driven into a cluster of rocks, vessel sinks, leaving girlies stranded at sea.

The battle for survival begins.

Fan-fucking-tastic Five

Open Water garnished with The Shallows could've worked, but piss poor execution ensures shit doesn't.

Performances are terrible, script is woeful, and because dumb characters are so unlikable, I couldn't wait for everybody to die.

Sadly, not all of them do.

As for the shark, CG makes Sharknado look top notch.

If only this was a comedy...

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