Jackass: Best and Last - The scoop and digest

Jeff Tremaine directs the old and new guard for the final time.

For posterity:

Johnny Knoxville, Steve-O, Chris Pontius, Wee Man, Dave England, Danger Ehren, Preston Lacy, Rachel Wolfson, Jasper, Dark Shark, Poopies and Zach Holmes.

Summary

Greatest hits compilation features brand new stunts and never-before-seen footage.

25 years of hurt

First off, Knoxville has confirmed there won't be a .5 sequel.

Recycling tactic may frustrate some, but creative decision didn't bother me too much.

New material includes Larry the robot giving Steve-O a prostate exam using peanut butter, a birthday party with a rampant goat and an escape room from hell.

Best of all is Double Boom, as a virtually naked Preston Lacy suspended on a harness is lowered every time participants lying in the hot seat get a question wrong by quizmaster Knoxville.

Zach is the unfortunate recipient of being smothered by Lacy's ass.

(Laughs).

Drinking super laxatives literally results in a shitty game of Twister, with foul stench making somebody physically sick.

Against Frank Sinatra's My Way, 80 minutes or so appropriately concludes as the first film began, with the original cast riding in a giant shopping trolley through a valley of explosive charges.  Before makeshift transport goes over a steep cliff and goes boom at the bottom, Knoxville announces "It's the end".

Those observing destroyed puppets of themselves was surprisingly moving.

Supergirl (2026) - The scoop and digest

The second in James Gunn's DC Universe is directed Craig Gillespie and written by Ana Nogueira.

Milly Alcock - Kara Zor-El/Supergirl

Matthias Schoenaerts - Krem

Eve Ridley - Ruthye Marye Knoll

David Krumholtz - Zor-El

Emily Beecham - Alura In-Ze

David Corenswet - Kal-El/Clark Kent/Superman

Jason Momoa - Lobo

Summary

During the destruction of Krypton, Zoe-El and his wife Alura evacuate for Argo City, where Zor-El activates a force field.

Eight years later, Alura gives birth to Kara, but later succumbs to radiation produced by a mineral known as Kryptonite.  Zor-El decides to send Kara and her dog Krypto to Earth, who after meeting her cousin Clark Kent, tries to adjust to pastures new.

While off-world celebrating her 23rd birthday, Kara meets Ruthye, who asks for help to avenge the death of her family at the hands of Brigand leader Krem, but she's not interested.

Krem shows up with his crew of Mad Max rejects and when Krypto tries to stop them stealing Kara's spaceship, he's shot with a poisonous dart.

Learning that beloved mutt only has three days to live, Kara pursues Krem for the antidote he keeps on his person and reluctantly takes Ruthye with her.

Lots of pain and suffering

Sure the 1984 Helen Slater film was campy trash, but at least had charm.

This on the other hand was an unmitigated disaster.

Alcock is based the Woman of Tomorrow comic miniseries, but I bet character is more likable in source material.

Story is nearly as generic as Guardians of the Galaxy-esque action, which is way too dark.

Did they take heavy inspiration from AVP: Requiem?

Aquaman isn't given much to do, but Czarnian bounty hunter was fun.

The same can't be said about Schonaerts though, as he's the WORST fucking villain I have ever seen.

Man of Tomorrow is next, and I honestly 'can' wait.

Toy Story 5 - The scoop and digest

The fifth main instalment (set two years after predecessor), is directed by series veteran Andrew Stanton, who conceived story and co-wrote screenplay with Kenna Harris.

Tom Hanks - Woody

Tim Allen - Buzz Lightyear

Joan Cusack - Jessie

Greta Lee - Lilypad

Conan O'Brien - Smarty Pants

Shelby Rabara - Snappy

Craig Robinson - Atlas

Scarlett Spears - Bonnie

Mykal-Michelle Harris - Blaze

Ernie Hudson - Combat Carl

Summary

A cargo ship containing a unit of hi-tech Buzz toys crash-lands on an island.  Stuck in demo mode, they follow the North Star to 'rendezvous' with Star Command.

With tablets being the latest trend, Bonnie Anderson's parents gift eight-year-old a Lilypad so she can socialise with the other kids.

Concerned at Bonnie's neglect, Jessie contacts Woody for advice, who's helping Bo Peep rehouse abandoned toys.

When Jessie and Bullseye go missing, Woody and Buzz search for their friends.

Mid-credits

A child in a playground is stunned by a Buzz drone flying down to him.  Immediately after, the rest descend and every kid claims one, including a teacher.

The camera pans to a kid produces an upgraded version of Emperor Zurg from this backpack.  We wrap after Buzz's father says: "We meet again, my son!"

HorseGrrll

Like 4, this wasn't bad or anything, but fails to justify its existence.

But money.

While billed as a sequel to 4, it's effectively a continuation of 2, bringing Jessie's narrative to a close.

Although most established characters are just background noise, new additions Smarty Pants, GPS receiver Atlas and camera Snappy provided some fun moments.

Part way through, Woody removes his hat and bald patch reflects light, dazzling those around him.

Also, the original Buzz has put on timber.

Visual gags are supposed to be funny, but toys 'aging' was just stupid.

The Furious - The scoop and digest

After multiple collaborations with the legendary Donnie Yen, Kenji Tanigaki's third feature is written by Mak Tin-shu, Lei Zhilong, Shum Kwan-sin and Frank Hui.

Xie Miao - Wang Wei

Joe Taslim - Navin

Brian Le - Ho

Yang Enyou - Rainy

Yayan Ruhian - Tak

Jeeja Yanin - Matia

Joey Iwanaga - Paklung

Sahajak Boonthanakit - Mr. Song

Summary

In an unnamed Asian city, journalist Matia is invesigating a local trafficking gang.  Against the wishes of her husband Navin, she infiltrates a hideout and is captured by its leader Paklung and his enforcer Tak.

Some time later, mute handyman Wang Wei has an argument with his daughter Rainy after he refuses to return to their home country.

After Rainy storms off in a huff, she's bagged and kidnapped by the gang.

Wang gives chase, but rescue attempt is foiled when he's hit by a truck.

As the local police force are more corrupt than a straight banana, Wang teams up with Navin to destroy anybody who gets in their way.

Feint and attack

The problem every modern martial arts flick has is clearing the ridiculously high bar set by The Raid series.

This falls short, but stunt work and choreography is superb and action moves at a blistering pace, even if carnage is hampered by CG blood.

Also, wooden dialogue is compounded by weird dubbing.

But those are minor quibbles, because fucking Mad Dog is lethal with a bow and arrow.

Five-way climax takes place at the police station, with Wang and Paklung eventually duelling with bicycles.

Why not, right?

Cape Fear (2026) - Episode 4

Pierced

Written by Tara Shivkumar

Directed by Reed Morano

At a bar, Max tells Tom that Zack had a dream and drew a picture of his unborn son Adam, confirming Max didn't give Zack anything last week.

After getting ooh la la, Natalie lets Nevaeh pierce her left nipple.

Tom and Zack's fractured relationship intensifies, leading Tom to have a flashback of him discovering that his older brother committed suicide.

Also, Zack has apparently thrown away his toe.

Max leads a rally to free Ruben Ramirez from Tarwater.

Anna asks Max to speak with former convict and snake enthusiast Warren Pitt, as 'Smiley' is the only person who can prove Ramirez didn't kill Maya Cook at a party back in 2003.

Max agrees and surprises Anna by kissing her.  She warns shit won't happen again, but reaction suggests she enjoyed it.

At Pitt's house, Max attacks him off screen and gets the evidence required, as a man called Andre King was responsible for Maya's murder. 

Ray calls Anna and reveals Nevaeh's mum Faith was a prison nurse and got fired for having sex with Max, saying Nevaeh could be Max's daughter.

Assessment

While identity remains unknown, Max's stalker shows up a few times, telling Anna to stay well clear.

Is Nevaeh's mother alive or dead? Somebody we haven't seen yet?

Stop making us wait dammit.

(Laughs).

Albums, Posters and Cover Art - Battle Royale VI

Miscellany

Muse - Simulation Theory vs Ready Player One

Hideous Divinity - Simulacrum vs Society

Time to get naughty.

Dead Pleasures - Revolting vs Monster aka Humanoids from the Deep

Bloody Hammers - Under Satan's Sun vs The Undead

And no, they didn't get permission.

Ghost

Swedish rock band have been spoofing films for years.

If You Have Ghost - EP vs Nosferatu

Singles

Cirice vs The Silence of the Lambs

Majesty vs King Kong (1933)

Zenith vs Rosemary's Baby

Albums

Meliora vs Metropolis

Infestissumam vs Amadeus

Opus Eponymous vs Salem's Lot

The following aren't based on any film in particular, but nobody would blame you for thinking otherwise.

Alice Cooper - The Revenge of Alice Cooper

Bastille - Bad Blood

Burning Witches - The Dark Tower

Kim Wilde - Here Come the Aliens

Nuclear Assault - Game Over

The Raveonettes - Pretty in Black

Sami Yaffa - Satan's Helpers, War Lazer Eyes and The Money Pig Circus

The Damned - A Night of a Thousand Vampires: Live in London

The Switch - No Way Out

Uncle Acid & the Deadbeats - Nell' Ora Blu

Visions of Atlantis - Armada LIVE Over Europe

Montrose - Warner Bros. Presents Montrose!

Wednesday 13 - The Dixie Dead

Ice Nine Kills

The Silver Scream

The Silver Scream 2: Welcome to Horrorwood

Gama Bomb

Citizen Brain

Survival of the Fastest

Untouchable Glory

Sea Savage

Tales from the Grave in Space

Sinister (2012)

Cry of Fear¹ (2013) vs poster

¹Indie survival horror was derived from a mod for Half-Life.

Bughuul aka Mr. Boogie vs Mick Thomson - Slipknot

Producers Jason Blum and Brian Kavanaugh admit "The Eater of Children" was based on guitarist's mask.

Who's this?

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1990)
The mask Elias Koteas wears for his version of Casey Jones looks remarkably similar.

Obscure (2004)

Something very strange is going on at Leafmore High.

Namely, a random picture.

Zooming in.

I have no explanation for this bullshit.

Finally.

Sinister 2 (2015) vs Nosferatu: The Wrath of Malachi (2003)

WTF?

Dracula (1931)

Queens of the Stone Age - Like Clockwork vs poster

More. More. More.

Nosferatu (1994/1995)
Despite title, Erin must rescue his girlfriend Erin from Count Dracula, not Count Orlok.
Anyway, like Prince of Persia, Another World and Lester the Unlikely, cinematic platformer uses rotoscoped animation, but unresponsive controls derailed experience.

"The Fearless Vampire Killers"

And related (or not).

The Haunted Dancers vs Death and the Woman - Hans Baldung

Creepy stuff.

Taste the Blood of Dracula (1970)

In his fourth stint as the titular vampire, Christopher Lee prepares to bite Isla Blair.

Dracula (2023) - Issue one

The Vourdalak (2023)

Dracula The Undead² (1991)

²Working title for Bram Stoker's original novel was The Un-Dead.

For much more besides, why not sink your teeth into the following link?

https://nukesandknives.blogspot.com/2023/07/dracula-blood-and-wine.html

Until next time.