Friday, 6 February 2026

Iron Lung (2026) - The scoop and digest

Based on David Szymanski's 2022 video game of same name, YouTuber Mark Fischbach (better known as Markiplier), stars, writes, directs and funded feature debut.

Support includes Troy Baker (David) and Elle LaMont (Whisper).  Additionally, Szymanski plays a fictionalised version of himself.

Summary

An event called the Quiet Rapture causes all stars and planets to vanish, leaving only those on space stations or ships alive.

For his involvement in destroying Filament Station, a convict called Simon is forced to explore an ocean of blood on a desolate moon named AT-5, in a submarine nicknamed the "Iron Lung".

After his camera (revealed to be an X-ray device) picks up an alien skeleton, he starts to lose his grip on reality.

Insufficient privileges

Just... fucking HORRIBLE.

If a guy making notes, clicking buttons and babbling bullshit inside a poorly lit tin can for two hours is your idea of fun, then you'll have a blast.

But I suspect most will claw their eyes out of boredom and frustration.

Non-existent story has zero character development and nothing makes any sense.

Even out of morbid curiosity, heed my advice and DO NOT WASTE YOUR TIME.

Thursday, 5 February 2026

Send Help - The scoop and digest

Sam Raimi's psychological horror thriller is scored by Danny Elfman and written by Damian Shannon and Mark Swift.

Rachel McAdams - Linda Liddle
Dylan O'Brien - Bradley Preston
Edyll Ismail - Zuri
Xavier Samuel - Donovan Murphy
Chris Pang - Chase
Dennis Haysbert - Franklin

Summary

After becoming the new president of his late father's company, Bradley Preston invites survival enthusiast Linda Liddle to Bangkok to help finalise the company's impending merger.

En route, the plane suffers engine failure and crashes into the sea, killing everybody except Linda and Bradley.

Lowly employee and sexist boss must put their differences aside and work together to survive on remote island.

At first, things aren't too bad, but as time goes by - tensions run high.

No help is coming
 
Welcome back Sam Raimi.

Office Space, Cast Away, Triangle of Sadness and Misery? Yes to all.

Amidst the blood and vomit cannons, leads embrace unhinged mania with gusto, and benefit from a script that revels in pitch black humour.

Signature splatstick is handled with aplomb and a nightmare delivers a ghoulish jump scare. 

Linda goes hunting and kills a boar, covering her in blood.  Rest assured, quality of CG beast is way better than The Strangers: Chapter 2.

Here's the killer twist.

Linda claimed her husband was killed in a drink-driving accident, but she actually murdered him.

After adding Bradley's fiancée Zuri and hired boat driver to the body count, Bradley finds Zuri's corpse and hand exposed on the beach (a clever nod to Chrissie in Jaws).

R.I.P. Susan Backlinie.

Climax

Bradley flees to a deserted beach house that Linda took over weeks ago and takes a shotgun from her, which is unloaded.  She then plays golf with Bradley's head, thinking she's fucking Abby from The Last of Us Part II.

We smash cut nearly a year later to Linda being interviewed at a celebrity golf tournament about the upcoming film adaptation of her best-selling memoir.

She drives off in a flash car singing to her favourite Blondie song One Way or Another, giving the camera a chilling glance.

Ending is bound to polarise, but just go with it.

Sunday, 1 February 2026

The Legacy of The Texas Chain Saw Massacre

18 August 1973.

What should have been an idyllic summer afternoon in South Texas became a nightmare for five youths, particularly Sally Hardesty, and her invalid brother Franklin, as the events of that day led to the discovery of one of the most bizarre crimes in the annals of American history, The Texas Chain Saw Massacre.

Erroneous rip offs

The similarities in The Hills Have Eyes (1977) were intentional, as Wes Craven was a huge fan of Tobe Hooper's seminal work.

Motel Hell (1980) was a satire on other films, such as Psycho (1960) and Rob Zombie's debut House of 1000 Corpses (2003) is also given the benefit of the doubt.

But there's no defending this lot.

Slaughterhouse (1987)
The Butcher (2006)
Cannibal Farm aka Escape from Cannibal Farm (2017)
No Such Thing as Monsters (2019)

Now for the more obscure.

Butchers (2020)
Butchers Book Two: Raghorn (2024)
Butchers Book Three: Bonesaw (2024)

Although Adrian Langley directed trilogy, stories are unrelated.

Worst of all, and I mean WORST is:

Mary Had a Little Lamb (2022)

Best. Film. Ever.

Cash-in titles

The following are nothing like what you're led to believe.

Blackest Heart aka The German Texas Chainsaw Massacre - The First Hour of the Reunification¹ (1990)
Roadside Massacre aka The Texas Roadside Massacre (2012)

¹Marketed as a parody.

Video games

Atari 2600

Moot point of course, but 1982 prototype was meant to let you play the vengeful Leatherface, or an innocent victim looking for safety.

Sadly, no screens exist, but cover art was adapted from the 1982 Wizard VHS home release.


Poster (left) and Pam (right).


But I know what you're thinking.

Who the fuck is this guy?
Dick Tracy? Some generic detective?

Nobody knows.

1983 retail version 

Put aside your childish pastimes, stop eating dots and chasing ghosts!
A ripping revving chainsaw is at your command as you wear the leather mask of a madman! Your victims come face to face with a living nightmare as you wield the ultimate weapon - an unrelentless chainsaw! Let your most wicked fantasies go wild! Know the total pleasures of destruction as you pursue your victims with the razor sharp teeth of a hungry chainsaw! The story is true, the movie is chilling, the video game is horrifying!
Ignoring the pathetic jibe at Pac-Man, I must say blurb encouraging kids to go on a fucking killing spree was very responsible.

HA HA HA!

Yeah, chop those bitches up.
Running out of gas results in game over (and a kick in the ass).

Sprite's colour scheme raises eyebrows.

Is Leatherface black? No. Does he have a mohawk? No. 

But I know a certain somebody who matches description.

Clubber Lang - Rocky III (1982)
Anything's possible.

40 years later.

Following in the asymmetrical footsteps of Friday the 13th: The Game (2017) and Evil Dead: The Game (2022), survival horror was initially developed by Sumo Nottingham in 2023 and completed by Black Tower Studios in 2024.

After choosing to play as a family member or victim, each match is set on one of six maps that have a day and night variation (except the graveyard).

Match ends when all victims either escape or are killed. 

Family members must also feed Grandpa victims' blood.
Let's take a peek at dude dancing the sunlight.


A slight improvement over the Atari game wouldn't you say.

Resident Evil 4 (2005)

Dr. Salvador is Leatherface and Jason - Friday the 13th Part 2 (1981)


Burlap sack may have been lifted from:

Phantom Killer - The Town That Dreaded Sundown (1976)
Resident Evil 7: Biohazard (2017)

Baker Residence vs Chainsaw House


Mia vs Leatherface


Our lass even cuts through a door.


"Old" Eveline vs Grandpa


D-Series subject vs Grandma 


Dinner is served


Chainsaw controllers

NubyTech released two different types for the Gamecube (left) and PS2 (right).


No two units were the same, as blood splatter is unique.  Unlike the Gamecube, PS2 equivalent boasted ripcord and buzzing sound.

Yellow and red reflect the colours of weapons that Dr. Salvador and the Bella Sisters wield. 


The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2 (1986)

Very briefly.

Former Texas ranger turned vigilante Lieutentant "Lefty" Enright (Dennis Hopper) walks into Cut-Rite Chain Saws and red and yellow power tools catch his eye. 
Hmmm.

Ethan and Jack vs Lefty and Leatherface


Chainsaw duel was probably inspired by Motel Hell (1980).

Vincent vs Bruce
For shiggles.

Jason vs. Leatherface - issue 1 (October 1995)
Footage in film

Summer School (1987)
Serial Mom (1994)
American Psycho (2000)
Freddy Got Fingered (2001)
The Boss (2016)
Apples (2020)

Guest appearances

Dead by Daylight (The Cannibal was introduced in 2017)
Mortal Kombat X (2015) - Kombat Pack 2 DLC
Terrordrome: Rise of the Boogeymen (2015)
Homages

Film

Scream (1996)

Randy Meeks calls Billy Loomis "Leatherface" at Stu Macher's party.

Pieces (1982)
You don't have to go to Texas for a chainsaw massacre
(Laughs).

Podge - Inbred (2011)
Leatherlace - Death House (2017)
Pleatherface - Stan Helsing (2009)
Leatherface - Transylvania Twist (1989)
Weirdest of all.

Rocky V (1990)
After learning he's been declared bankrupt, Rocky is wearing a Leatherface jumper.
Video games

Mad Butcher - Castlevania: Order of Ecclesia (2008)
James Sunderland - Silent Hill 2 (2001)
Hillbilly - Stubbs the Zombie in Rebel Without a Pulse (2005)
Samson - The House of the Dead (1996)
Miscellany

Bob's Burgers - The Hauntening (S6 E3) - October 2015
The Evil Within² (2014)
Chainsaw 3D is one of game's several fake posters.
As a coincidental quirk, Texas Chainsaw 3D (the 'second' sequel to 1974 original), hit cinemas a year before in 2013.   
²ntbcw 2017 film of same name

Illbleed (2001)
A billboard in Dreamcast exclusive displays fictional film Massacre in Nature, directed by Tomy Hopper no less, a play on Tobe Hooper
Marc Nispel's 2003 remake renamed Sally's character Erin (Jessica Biel), introduced Sheriff Hoyt (R. Lee Ermey) and kicked off a whole new continuity (largely existing in comics), but that's another story.
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