Friday, 22 March 2024

Road House (2024) - The scoop and digest

From a screenplay by Anthony Bagarozzi and Charles Mondry, Doug Liman reimagines 1989 cult classic of same name.

Jake Gyllenhaal - Elwood Dalton
Daniela Melchior - Ellie
Conor McGregor - Knox
Billy Magnussen - Ben Brandt
Jessica Williams - Frankie
B.K. Cannon - Laura
Joaquim de Almeida - Sheriff

Summary

Former UFC champion Elwood Dalton makes a living by scamming fighters in the underground circuit.

After witnessing his latest 'victory', Frankie asks him to be the head bouncer at The Road House in Florida Keys, as beach bar is attracting the wrong clientele.

Dalton soon clashes with a biker gang, who work for crime boss Ben Brandt.

Getting wind of the situation, Ben's father Gerald contacts mafia enforcer Knox to hunt Dalton down.

Amidst all this, we learn Sheriff "Big Dick" is corrupt and tells Dalton to get the fuck out of dodge.

Mid-credits

Knox is revealed to have survived and escapes from hospital.

All at sea

Touching the untouchable needs to stop - RIGHT NOW.

Seriously, the only highlight is Jake Gyllenhaal and Patrick Swayze would probably appreciate his performance.

The rest is just...

Brandt's rubbish goons, aka "rage-filled dickheads" attempt goofy humour, but spectacularly fail.

McGregor's acting debut is embarrassing and quality of CG between him and Dalton insults a terrible video game.

Was forgotten direct-to-video sequel Road House 2 better?

Maybe.

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