Monday 27 September 2021

Video Game Box Art mistakes (2 of 2)

Let's recap.


Legend.

EU - Europe
NA - North America
JP - Japan

Delusions

Platoon (2002)
RTS claims to be 'the first strategy game about the Vietnam war'.
Really?

'Nam 1965-1975 (1991) and the aptly titled Nam (1986) would disagree.

Fatal Frame (NA) is 'based on a true story'.
What a load of Camera Obscura, because Tecmo's unsettling series was inspired by Japanese urban legends and ghost stories.
Demolition Girl (EU)
We clock Seattle's Space Needle.
Trouble is, game is not set in America.
Titular antagonist Riho Futaba is heading for Japan's capital Tokyo.
Big Rigs: Over the Road Racing
No cops, no physics, no hope.
You don't haul loads to any destination and will never have to worry about staying one step ahead of the law in the most broken fucking game of all time.
When life kicks you in the unmentionables, always remember this.

You're winner.

Goldeneye 007 (N64)

NA
12 interactive 3-D environments, Spyder gun and Bond shooting geezer oozing claret?
Lies, lies and more lies.
EU
Screenshots remain unchanged, but at least navigating 20 environments is correct. 
Golden Axe (NA)
Why is Ax=Battler holding an axe?
Not sure.

As we all should know.

Conan wannabe slew enemies with broadsword.
Turok: Dinosaur Hunter (EU and NA)
Even though we play Tal'Set, box art shows Joshua Fireseed.
Fireseed became the main character in Turok 2: Seeds of Evil.
Tal'Set is more accurate in Japanese release.
Love this one.

Space Invaders: Invasion Day (EU)
Title makes absolutely no FUCKING sense, as game takes place after aliens invaded.
Going against the grain.

Manual states INVADERS CAME!
So scenario has already happened before we've even inserted disc?
BRILLIANT.
Also, Decenber.
Annoyingly, said date was on a Thursday.
Taito were that embarrassed by actual game, the remainder of PS2 and Gamecube versions were retitled Space Raiders.

False advertising

In the good old days of C64, Spectrum, Amstrad CPC, Amiga etc, box art often warned that screen shots may not be from said format.

Consoles never did that, so images should always represent reality.

However, in the following cases.

Batman (Genesis)
NES version shown.
Tony Hawk's Pro Skater 3 (Gamecube)
PS2 version shown.
Mixing shit up.

Sonic's Ultimate Genesis Collection/Sega Mega Drive Ultimate Collection (PS3/360)
Random screen states action is from Sonic The Hedgehog 2.
First off, The should the.
But more to the point, screen is actually from Sonic 3.
Specifically.
Angel Island Zone Act 1
HA HA HA!

Trilogies and Compilations

Prince of Persia: Trilogy (PS2)
Games are laid out chronologically.
Nice.

But back art displays them back to front.
SNK Arcade Classics Vol. 1
Subtitles are omitted, namely King of Fighters (Fatal Fury), Roddy and Cathy (Top Hunter), Super Vehicle-001 (Metal Slug) and The Next Glory (Super Sidekicks 3).
I get mindset because of space restrictions.

Anyway, Sidekicks 3 was released in 1995, not 1992.

Jesus Christ.

Ironically, original was released in 1992.

We never got a Vol. 2, but exclusive Japanese PSP sequel Vol. 0 featured 20 arcade games created before the Neo Geo.

Taito Legends
More erroneous titles.
Electric Yo-Yo should be The Electric Yo-Yo, New Zealand Story should be The NewZealand Story and Space Invaders part 2 should be Space Invaders Part II.
Rainbow Islands was officially subbed The Story of Bubble Bobble 2, but conversions begged to differ.

Taito Legends 2 (PS2¹)

Now shit gets tasty.

Nastar (EU title) is indeed the sequel to Rastan, but was never known as Rastan 2.
The nearest thing was Rastan Saga II (JP).
The excellent Space Invaders '95 was subbed The Attack of the Lunar Loonies, but strangest of all is Gun & Frontier
Guess Gun Frontier was too boring.
One of four games exclusive to format was G Darius, which should be G-Darius.
Scrolling further down.

We're kindly informed that Puzzle Bobble 2, Darius GaidenSpace Invaders DX ...and many more arcade classics are included.
Thanks for that, but we ALREADY know.
¹Xbox version boasted Bubble Symphony, Rayforce, Cadash and Pop'n Pop (written incorrectly as Pop 'n Pop).

Call of Duty: Trilogy (PS2)
Finest Hour was brought by Spark Unlimited, and Treyarch were responsible for COD 3 and COD 2: Big Red One.
So it begs the fucking question why Infinity Ward's COD 2 dominates background.
Call of Duty: Modern Warfare Trilogy (NA)
The first in series was called Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare.
To be fair, I suppose Modern Warfare gels better.

Turning over.

Fine and dandy.
But getting to the nitty gritty.

Everything is backwards.
The hilarious twist.

EU is spot on.
WTF?

Last few.

The House of the Dead 2 & 3 Return
Third instalment is called The House of the Dead III.
Back art acknowledges fact.
Phobia of 'The' escalates.

Xbox port of THOTD III includes unlockable version of 'House Of The Dead II'.
(Sigh).

More sequel shenanigans, this time on PC.

Published by Fair Game
The sequel to the best selling House of the Dead.
And something different.

Published by Xplosiv
Empire brings you The House of the Dead 2, in all it's gory glory!

Its such a shame (they fucked up).

Another series ends, but I'll be back with more catastrophic cock-ups.

Monday 20 September 2021

Resident Evil (2002 Remake) - Goofs

One of the greatest remakes of all time takes Spencer stage.

But my mission is not to heap praise.

Focus is mainly on Jill's campaign, but Chris will occasionally pop up too. 

Contradictions

Files are largely called two different things.

Researcher's letter and Letter of a Researcher
Barry's photograph and Barry's picture
A family picture and notes and A family picture and some notes
Special instructions for the disposal of dead bodies and Special instructions when disposing dead bodies
Trevor's diary and G. Trevor's diary
Book of Curses and A Book of a Curse
Mail to the Chief of Security and Chief of Security
Perversely, some are spot on.

PLANT 42 REPORT
Organic Chemistry Lab Experiment
Mixing shit up.

This painting is described thusly:
A picture of a woman praying in front of a large crowd.
However, identical painting upstairs disagrees.

A picture of a woman mourning in front of a large crowd.
Make up your fucking mind.

Oh, message isn't included because it's split into three parts (which is weird in itself).

One more.

Plaque states Tiger With Yellow and Blue Eyes.
But inscription reads.

"A tiger glowing with blue and yellow light"
Hmmm.

Continuity

A complicated animal, but here goes.

Dining Room

Jill opens half of double door for Barry.

This is accurate to loading animation.
One problem.

Barry walks through door twice.
Dining Room (revisited)

After Jill flees from Kenneth's killer, door opens.
But she's forced to open the door again.
And it gets better.

As zombie enters room, door has vanished.
While Barry is 'taking care of it', not only has door reappeared, it's now closed.
Bathroom

Mirror casts reflection of ceiling fan.
But courtesy isn't extended to Jill and zombie.


Are they fucking vampires?

But much later at the back of Art Room.

Absolutely perfect.
Ha ha ha.

Ceiling trap

Bagging shotgun from adjacent room activates trap.
Ceiling is now a lot higher than before.
Barry drags colleague's ass to safety.
Heigh-Ho Heigh-Ho. It's through the door we go.
What happens next?

Correct. Twice again, and door stays open.
And a moment later, it's magically closed.
Richard

When we first encounter doomed dude, Yawn has just bitten him.
Unlucky mate.

But in order to access this room, we need Armor key and then Shield key to get at Yawn.

As Richard had neither, how the FUCK did he get inside?

Yeah I know, enemies frequently defy logic, but even so.

Note he's unarmed.
Yawn (first encounter)

During payback time, geezer has conveniently found an assault shotgun.
After giant reptile plays dead, subsequent cut scene plays out twice.


Residence

With Plant 42 destroyed and Helmet key secured, we bump into Wesker.
What's he shooting at?

Apparently fresh air.
When gameplay resumes.

Wasps lie dead on the floor.
Aqua Ring

If we bullshit around draining water, death is certain.
Huge crack is impossible to miss.
Just before Mother Neptune breaks tank Jaws 3 style, blemish has disappeared.
Miscellany

Inside mansion, we hear thunder and see lightning, but this never happens outside.


North leads to the Valley of Destruction.
Tempting, but I'd much rather visit the Valley of Destrution (as per signpost).
Laboratory computer releases electronic locks.
It is a well known fact that there exist many plants that are credited with medicinal healing powers.
They this makes sense, right?

What a load ROPLS.

Richard claims our friend Yawn 'had to be poisonous...'
Not really, as depending on species, snakes can only be venomous.
G. Trevor's diary (near his grave)
Even in the darkness something caught my eye too.
There isn't 31 bastard days in November.
Keeper's Diary was compiled between May 9 - May 19 1998.
However, final entry was made on May 21, and also when Keeper ate Scott.
This COMPLETELY contradicts original, as Keeper killed ugly face on May 19.
Itchy. Tasty.
PLANT 42 REPORT
Blah blah, the T-Virus has had a substantially stronger affect on this one.
Context is incorrect, as effect should've been used.
Last but not least.

A family picture and notes (first part)
Nov. 10, 1967
-Progenitor Virus administered.
Thumbs up.

However...

Observation Note
The discovery of the G-Virus was in fact 21 years after the administration of the primogenitor virus.
HA HA HA!

Until next time.
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