*The remake section has been heavily updated, as the
'original' was pretty bare to what it could have been so after rifling through
my DVD collection and flicking the brain into gear, this is now much better.
I can safely say that the original was somewhat
deciduous, now I'm back with an evergreen effort.
I haven't * things as there was a helluva lot but
shouldn't take too much to notice the aggressive expansion.
Mainly in the 70s to 90s, there were original films
(maybe not in content or genre but definitely in title), that were simply billy
no mates films but if the first was successful enough and demand was
warranted, that film would gain a number of friends and spawn a number of
sequels.
If it was really successful and further money was
smelt, the franchise would become a long-running series, with sequel upon
sequel (usually getting more ridiculous with each addition).
As time passed, other directors would go on
to make a film that looked strangely familiar and would 'remake' an
accepted classic.
In the past, remakes only existed but nowadays there's a
few more innovative ways that directors can reinvent a particular franchise and
then even make it sort of their own by adding sequels.
How can this be? Well the answers lie below:
Remake
A remake is basically the process of taking the original
and recreating the original, virtually scene for scene, maybe with some slight
alterations but largely keeping all the recognisable and well known bits but
just having different actors portray the roles and usually with 'better'
effects too.
These better effects can be a double-edged sword though
as they can ruin the 'classic' look of the original as they tend to achieve
this by using CGI.
Nowadays, I like to call it Hollywood been short of
originality and fresh out of ideas.
The original should be always be considered as
superior. If it's a special effects powerhouse, the effects will also
look better, but are they actually more effective. Retro heads can always
disagree...
The title is usually retained too but not so for some.
Take the 50's film High Noon. This was later remade
in 1981 as Outland starring Sean Connery.
The remake of scary Spanish horror REC which would be
remade in the US of A as Quarantine and Swedish horror Let the Right One was
renamed Let Me In.
Quarantine 2: Terminal was not a remake of Rec 2 and
although the same principle, this was an original film.
Surprisingly, it is actually rather good.
We go back to the past with Kurosawa's classic The Seven
Samuari (1954) and then a few years later in 1960 - The Magnificent Seven.
Assassination thriller The Jackal was released in 1973
and would be later remade as The Day of the Jackal in 1997.
Hitchcock classic Vertigo (1958) gets a makeover in 1976
with Brian De Palma's Obsession.
The Uninvited (2009) is a remake of Korean horror A Tale
of Two Sisters (2003).
Also, Japanese terror Ju-On - The Grudge would be remade
in 2004 as simply The Grudge.
Spanish sci-fi Open Your Eyes (1997) would be remade as
Vanilla Sky (2001), which was a forgettable Tom Cruise effort.
The 1974 classic Burt Reynolds sporting drama The Longest
Yard had two remakes.
Before we continue with more, The Longest Yard was originally
called The Mean Machine (I know this as I watched it on TV years ago). It
really was donkeys ago, when VHS was still one the most essential piece of
entertainment technology to own.
So first came Vinnie Jones and his Mean Machine in 2001
(using football instead of American Football) but apart from that unsubtle
change, most of the script was recycled and quoted word for word, just in
slightly different situations.
It was basically an excuse to reunite most of the cast
who starred in Lock, Stock and Snatch.
Although, unlike the latter and former, this wasn't
directed by Guy Ritchie.
Whatever, it was pretty awful stuff.
In 2005, Adam Sandler took the lead role along with
annoying Chris Rock and this was an official remake, but this was just The
Longest Mile as been as good as the original.
Reynolds did co-star and take on the different role as
Nate Scarborough (portrayed by Michael Conrad in the original).
Back to more remakes with a different name.
Hong Kong classic Infernal Affairs (2002), yes that's not
a typo would be later remade by Scorcese as The Departed in 2006.
Korean horror Into the Mirror (2003) would become Mirrors
in 2008. That also had a unrelated sequel in 2010.
The House on Sorority Row is a 1983 horror and then was
shortened to just Sorority Row in 2009. Why?
The Thing from Another World (1951) became The Thing in
1982. This is surely the grandaddy of all handmade special effect
creature features. Carpenter's classic is just brilliant and the gore and
design remain awesome today.
The prequel (also The Thing) is actually quite good but even so, it wasn't needed. I remember thinking the same as Palmer when I heard about it, namely "You gotta be fucking kidding."
Spielberg's Always (1989), original was A Guy Named Joe
in 1943.
Kairo is a 2001 Japanese horror and would become Pulse in
2006.
Michael Mann would later remake his made for TV movie
L.A. Takedown (1989) as Heat in 1995 which was the first time De Niro and
Pacino acted together.
Still, in 2008 they would be reunited again, but this
time for an entire film in Righteous Kill.
Unfortunately, it was a shite cop thriller and proved
that shoving two Hollywood heavyweights together in the ring doesn't always
guarantee a good film.
Another Hitchcock effort in 1954 was Rear Window and
later became Disturbia in 2007.
Of the direct title remakes, here's a yummy
selection. There is of course more than I'll mention and the
remake will probably be more famous than the original and hence, some may not
even know that there was an original.
But I suppose that's inevitable.
The Day the Earth Stood Still (1951 and 2008)
Alfie (1966 and 2004)
Scarface (1932 and 1983)
Night of the Demons (1988 and 2009)
The Eye (2002 and 2008)
The Wicker Man (1973 and 2006). I think this is up
there with the worst of all remakes. It's really fucking awful.
Shutter (2004 and 2008)
The Omen (1976 and 2006)
My Bloody Valentine (1981 and 2009)
The Hills Have Eyes (1977 and 2006)
Piranha (1978, 1995 and 2010). The 2010 version is
called Piranha 3D. The sequel to this is Piranha 3DD. Using DD as a
boob cup is quite funny. I may go and see the nasty fishes chomping on
busty beauties and other unfortunates. This sort of trash is right up my
avenue.
Black Christmas (1974 and 2006)
I Spit on Your Grave (1978 and 2010)
The Last House on the Left (1972 and 2009)
The Ring (1998 and 2002)
Bedazzled (1967 and 2000)
3:10 to Yuma (1957 and 2007)
Straw Dogs (1971 and 2011)
The Italian Job (1969 and 2003)
It's Alive (1974 and 2008)
The Crazies (1973 and 2010)
Clash of the Titans (1981 and 2010)
Insomnia (1997 and 2002)
Assault on Precinct 13 (1976 and 2005)
The Fog (1980 and 2005)
The Firm (1989 and 2009)
War of the Worlds (1953 and 2005)
Cape Fear (1962 and 1991)
Sisters (1973 and 2006)
The Amityville Horror (1979 and 2005)
True Grit (1969 and 2010)
The Fly (1958) and then in 1986. This is one of the
few exceptions in which I'd say that effects triumphed over the original and in
Cronenberg's remake, they were deliciously gruesome.
Get Carter in 1971 and 2000. The original is one of
the many classic films with Michael Caine but replacing him with Sylvester
Stallone, what I'd say to this is a Natalie Imbruglia song - Big Mistake.
The Hitcher (1986) is a great cat and mouse thriller,
starring Rutger Hauer - portraying one of the best villains of the 80's and
beyond. He would be replaced by Sean Bean in 2007.
Unfortunately, this was an awful idea and Sean Bean was
shit.
They even made a sequel to the remake (totally unrelated
to the original as that never had a sequel).
The Taking of Pelham One Two Three and/or 123 (1974 and
1998).
So fairly obviously, the original and remake, (both based
on a 1973 novel) and there was also a TV movie (the first remake) in 1998.
To be different, the second remake was the only one known
as The Taking of Pelham 123 and was released in 2009.
Let's ref again - Reservoir Dogs famously used colours to
describe the dogs in Tarantino's brilliant directorial debut including Mr
Orange, Brown, Blonde etc but Pelham would use these first as codenames such as
Mr Brown and Blue.
Brown and Blue were the only colours that would be later
'copied' in Dogs, I guess Quentin ran out of colours?
Here's a strange one to me, Michael Haneke made Funny
Games in 1997 which features a pair of youths who hold a couple hostage and
terrorise them.
A decade later, he remade it for the American audience.
It's an unusual slant as you'd expect the remake to be
remade in America by an American but not so.
Still, Mr Pink (Tim Roth) stars so it that can only be
good.
Romero zombie classics and his hordes of undead would be
remade a few times.
His iconic first, made on a shoestring budget in 1968
would be updated in 1990.
Perversely, there was a second remake.
In 2006, some might know that Night of the Living Dead 3D
was made but was quickly forgotten...
His third in 1985 (Day) was remade 23 years later and
would see Rhames star again but unlike in Dawn, he would receive some fatal
love bites.
The original maestro would continue his decaying
damnation that so far, remain 'unremade' with Land, Diary and Survival of the
Dead.
There's apparently more to follow...
I like my latest in my growing number of made-up words
lol.
So that's a whole load of remakes but who would shoot and
score as the best from the definitive original?
I suppose Last House and Straw Dogs are decent
candidates.
Ironically, both were infamous 70's hot spuds but
nowadays, there has been sort of relaxation in classification.
For gory purposes, Spit is the most graphic but that was
cut.
Maybe even Dawn of the Dead, if you take it for what it
is - an action horror minus the satire.
The worst were Mean Machine, The Hitcher, The Wicker Man
and Clash of the Titans - of the latter, the CGI beasties look crap to me.
Before we steamroll on, have you noticed that there are
many remakes of foreign horrors.
You don't have to be a genius to understand why....
There's many more that I haven't gone into but they are
there such as The Ring and Shutter.
Out of all foreign originals, I reckon The Ring and Rec
are the most famous and hence, some may have braved the subtitled world to
appreciate these (even if they’ve seen the American versions).
So far, there are loads of horrors and thrillers that
exist in world cinema that haven't been remade (yet). Of these, Oldboy,
The Chaser, I Saw the Devil, Inside, The Horde, Switchblade Romance and
Frontiers to name a few.
There's a French horror called Martyrs. I'm being
totally honest here - it's possibly the most upsetting film I've ever
seen. That emotion and/or feeling didn't change after a second viewing.
It really is a harrowing experience.
Reboot
This is a great idea. Take a well known franchise
and throw everything you know out of the window and start it all again as
basically your own film.
In short, take all the continuity out and hey presto -
it's a brand spanker.
As it's intended to be completely different from the
original, it allows directors a greater freedom of originality and plot
development.
The only thing that will remain true will obviously be
central characters.
They can try their damnedest to make it their own, but
never truly can as they weren't their creations to begin with.
There are others of course, but the best example would be
Christopher Nolan's Batman.
I'm hopeful it will be a truly astonishing conclusion
with The Dark Knight Rises in July which nicely fits in and around my birthday.
The Mrs may not know it yet, but she might be taking to
me to the pictures at some point then....
If it's not truly awesome, and just great - it'll be a
big disappointment.
He knew he had his hands full to make it even more great
than The Dark Knight.
I'll admit, it did have its boring bits but the screen
truly sizzled when the demented Joker nervously twitched his panda eyes.
Could Bane better him? I hope so.
Others include Daniel Craig's first outing as invincible
secret agent 007 in Casino Royale and J.J Abram's Star Trek.
We'll also include Predators and the upcoming The Amazing
Spider-Man.
An interesting animal was Fright Night in 2011. A
new take on the 1985 horror comedy classic and starred Colin Farrell who
replaced original bloodsucker Chris Sarandon.
Sarandon would also make a cameo in the reboot as a
driver who also gets bit by the new Jerry.
Credit junkies will also note his char is credited as Jay
Dee. Get it?
Oh never mind.
Anyway, apart from recreating certain scenes, it is decidedly
much darker than the original and with it being a reboot - why not?
You also have Conan the Barbarian.
Up and coming challengers see Total Recall and Robocop.
I have grave reservations about both and fear they’ll
destroy the originals, even if they’re not remakes.
Reimagining
This is the most awkward one to describe of all as this
it involves a new take on the original flick, and often have references to the
original in terms of plot development, classic scenes and images but
nevertheless, most have been significantly altered.
Examples include:
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1974 and 2003) which also
had its own prequel in 2006 (The Beginning) and Ocean's Eleven (1960 and
2001).
Danny Ocean's gang of thieves would expand from Twelve
and finally Thirteen (2004 and 2007 respectively).
Again, the original is known as numerals...
Mr Krueger would also star in his reimagining in 2010,
who first entered our nightmares in 1984.
Dawn of the Dead was also chosen in 2004 to go up against
the 1978 Romero satirical classic which surely remains as the ultimate example
in shuffling.
It was of course very different (apart from the shopping
mall setting) as the undead ran and didn't just wander aimlessly in classic
hungover style.
Hotty Sarah Polley and Ving Rhames would take on the
zombie masses during the 'going for the jugular' action.
Despite shedding its satirical skin, it would be a very
decent reimagining and even squeezed in the madness of the survivors having fun
in their own unique ways - in homage to the druggy original.
I'll finally mention Friday the 13th which saw baghead or
sackhead Vorhees eventually find his staple hockey mask.
Derek Mears and co did a great job.
Of those, I'd go for DOTD and Jason as been the most
worthy rehashes.
Combinations
While not an official term, combinations of the above is when
it gets really confusing and debatable if a film really fits into this
category.
I'd suggest a good example being Zombie's own version of
Halloween as all continuity was axed with a whole new angle and delved deeper
into Michael Myers' psyche (reboot) and referenced classic bits and bobs from
the original, hence applying the 'reimagining' tone.
It's good to see that although much unoriginality exists
among directors, at least there are new angles that can be taken and therefore
adding a new slice of pie.
Some remakes should be left well alone but I'm all for
reboots and reimaginings as it's fun to notice clever refs to the original.
Games to Films
To wrap up nicely, it's time to speak about turning a
video game franchise (successful or otherwise) into a film.
John McClane had very bad day(s), this would see be a
very bad idea from the outset...
This should never happen as IMHO, there's only really one
effort that's even worth silver celluloid....
Of course, some will disagree.
Mediocrity points to Hitman, Tomb Raider, Mortal Kombat
and Max Payne.
Almost inevitably, Resident Evil would infect the silver
screen and rightly or wrongly, was successful as so far, four films have
been churned out, all featuring some monsters from the games in one form
or another.
Dare I say it, the best effort was Silent Hill.
Don't take that as though I thought it was brilliant but
it was good enough to capture the atmosphere of the foggy psychological 'not
knowing what was real and reality' Jacob's Ladder inspired classic franchise.
The monsters looked nice too.
The rest were shat into the devil's public convenience
and horrendous efforts include Doom, Alone in the Dark, Street Fighter and
Super Mario Bros.
As a sub-topic, if these were supposed to be comedies....
The King of Fighters and DOA (Dead or Alive)
.....then I give up as somebody was having a really bad
and sick joke.
These weren't even funny, even Ed Wood directing would
struggle to raise a smile.
The ultimate travesty would not even be worthy of bowel
ejection into the Trainspotting toilet....
House of the Dead was brilliant, stupendous and awesome.
The sequel, Dead Aim was fantastic, fabulous and
incredible.
Hang on a cottin' picking minute, that can't be right as
I've used used six complimentary words so let's rewind to reality.
House of the Dead was terrible, appalling, abominable and
awful.
The sequel, Dead Aim was atrocious, offensive, hideous,
dreadful, harrowing and dire.
What drugs were taken during the production of these
calamities?
Honestly, these desecrate the principle of films in
general.
I'd even verse HOTD with Jaws: The Revenge in the
ultimate battle of badness.
Who'd win? Now you're asking....
If HOTD movies were balls of dung, the namesake beetle
wouldn't even entertain the notion of rolling this deplorable disdain.
Of all the examples I've given, that's been generous to
the tortoise's head.
For the future, selected franchises are also in development:
Uncharted, Bioshock, Halo and Castlevania will apparently
be made.
To be fair, Uncharted has the production values to be
great as he's basically a young Indiana Jones and if handled correctly - could
set the standard.
Who should be Drake?
Russell Crowe, Christian Bale, Matt Damon?
If it ever becomes reality - make sure it's somebody
either young or evergreen.
Books to Films
To mop up, film adaptations from books usually work – if it’s
a Stephen King novel. Misery, The
Shining, Thinners, Carrie, Stand by Me, The Shawshank Redemption et al.
In the right hands, Cliver Barker does pretty well and of
course there’s C.S Lewis, J.R.R Tolkien and Peter Benchley.
Other gems include adaptations of Stieg Larsson and John
Ajvide Lindqvist novels (of The Girl With The…. trilogy and Let the Right One
fame respectively).
Ian Fleming, Roald Dahl, Charles Dickens, Irvine Welsh
all have had their famous writings on the big screen.
There are of course others but the above are among the
most famous authors to have their penned fantasy transported to film.
Finally, I'll state a chilling and promised threat.
"See you... soon."
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