Sunday, 5 October 2014

Titles, taglines, subtitles and miscellany - Eager and elegant

Riding this harder than Seabiscuit should go some way in appreciating such glorious content.

Screw the terrible box art because if you thought the original Resident Evil moved like a malfunctioning tank, check out this piece of shit...
Even Die Hard 'stole' its climax.
Files and folders can get corrupted, but on this occasion...

Concluding the 'Prime' trilogy...
Unrelated game and film.

As you portray a stockbroker, the 1988 text adventure was probably inspired by Oliver Stone's Wall Street.

This time, game and TV series share nothing in common.

Ending with subtitle.

Despite some awful slowdown and frequent loading, the original Blood Omen was a bloody great excuse to feast on unfortunates.

D'yer know what?  I fucking hate Steven Seagal (and his films).

Under Siege was made famous for a bird bursting from a cake with huge tits.

Great legacy, right?

Dark Territory had all the action ingredients to be half decent but...

Anyway, plonk 'city' ahead of 'under siege' to create identical subtitle and three different experiences.

Overshadowed by Shinobi, ESWAT is considered one of Sega's rare arcade failures.

The Mega Drive game wasn't a sequel, but a mash up of the 1989 original.

Three words - six taglines.

Okay, Cloned is the odd one out for also possessing 'you will be replaced' but still counts.

The day after tomorrow, The World...

Same title, different artist.

Whether intentional or not, all share the same subtitle as this pseudo video game sequel to Scarface.

Of course, the above stemmed from an image we should all remember from the 1983 film.
The Cornetto trilogy ended with sci-fi and booze but laughs were in short supply. 
One of 007's worst modern day outings.
This action adventure RPG enjoys an innovative battle situation as chars exist in both zones, help each other out and fight the same enemy simultaneously.
Monkey Island: At World's End
The Dog Days are over; and

The Dark Days are under.

Screw the sun as Moon possesses the power of five.

Van Damme playing twins?  That's Double Impact.
As usual, Bolo is good value as a formidable villain.

Snowbird - (Moon)
Activating Regeneration.

I could reel off hundreds of songs but instead, here's a cocktail of my own mix.

Porn? Not really.  Art? Probably.
Seven Swords for Seven Romans.

Frank Frazetta was a genius.

There's also 7 Blades, a cheap clone of Dynasty Warriors 2.

Differing from the rest, the original was a 1997 weapons-based head to head fighter.

Although very similar in title, Koei's spin-off series to Romance of the Three Kingdoms has jack shit to do with Capcom's arcade scrolling fighters Dynasty Wars and sequel Warriors of Fate.

Double the amount of blades and you have...

Sharp stuff.

Despite Donnie Yen starring in Seven Swords and 14 Blades, both are standalone.

The same principle extends to Ving Rhames featuring in Zack Snyder's Dawn of the Dead and the shitty 2008 'remake' of Day of the Dead.

Of Snyder's impressive 2004 directorial debut, Romero's 1978 original remains omnipotent.

Mr. Rhames is back in 7 Below.

It would be rude not to include albums 7Fingers and Seven Dials from Nils Frahm/Anne Müller and former Aztec Camera frontman Roddy Frame.

Finally, 7 Sins and Helloween's album 7 Sinners.

Same tagline, different film.

Tinkering with grammar doesn't alter a bastard thing.

Original poster (left) and VHS Special Edition (right).

Along with a host of extras, theatrical or alternative versions are automatically included on DVD/Blu Ray but back in the days of VHS, we had to pay through our noses before minds could be made up to see if what was left out deserved its place on the cutting room floor.

Have a megablast on me.

Nobody remembers the original but with its stunning graphics and kick-ass music, the sequel was good enough to eat.
The Tribe and The Tribes.

If you let slip that Tribes are a band, remember to sleep with One Eye Shut.

Rival Swords (subtitle) and Rival Schools (franchise).

Finale, The Final and R-Type Final.

Inside and The Inside.

In Sides - Orbital
Come closer and see...

No wait, just ...look closer.

I'm not one to take liberties but nobody's perfect.

Sons of Liberty
Fall of Liberty
Wings of Liberty
"They're here."
Depending on what you believe, much of Poltergeist was down to Spielberg and not Tobe Hooper.

The debate continues to rage...

What's unique about Ghostbusters and Gremlins?

They were both released on the same day.  1 June 1984 to be exact.

In regards to these taglines, are both making reference to Carol Anne's iconic quote?

Notice how 'They're here' is considerably larger than its remainder and as for Gremlins, is it just coincidence that 'we're' rhymes nicely with 'they're'?


Something is afoot in the air.

First up, fear.

Evil is next.  I repeat, evil is next.

Thanks to the result of Ben Stiller's tug, love is very much in the hair for Cameron Diaz.

And for this film, love is in the air.

Another pair of double tags.

Hyphenation brings something near on identical.

Nobody gets out alive.

No One Here Gets Out Alive (album) and No one here gets out alive... (tagline).


Attack of the (whatever).

Too easy, right?

I agree, which is why aggressive expansion was required.

Attack of the Mutant Telephones is a stage from 1983 Matthew Smith's Speccy classic Manic Miner.
Finally, Space make obvious reference Nathan H. Juran's 1958 B-movie classic with their album Attack of the Mutant 50ft Kebab.

Alone in the Dark and Nightmare in the Dark.

'Something' watches as either Edward Carnby or Emily Hartwood approach Derceto and begin a psychological nightmare.
Fusing Lovecraft with Edgar Allen Poe's The Fall of the House of Usher, Infogrames' influential 1992 survival horror oozed dizzying tension and dazzling camera angles.
Following SNK's bankruptcy, only a tool would say this bizarre Tumblepop/Snow Bros. clone reinvigorated the Neo Geo.
Same tagline, different film (conclusion).

I know you're nervous but please, try to remain calm.

Cast your eyes over these lovelies that 'never looked so good'.

Evil, Death and;


Concluding with 'Vengeance has never looked so good...'

Australia, Mexico and Brazil are famous for superlative stretches of sun kissed sand.

Oops, mustn't forget about Daytona Beach in Florida.

Where the fuck am I going with this?

Jet Set Willy is happy to introduce.

The Beach
Only dickheads climbed ropes in 1984.

Sound Beach in SNK's original Fatal 'piece of shit' Fury.
The home of Terry became considerably more picturesque in Fatal Fury 3.
Sirena Beach in marmite tasting Gamecube effort Super Mario Sunshine.
'Official' settings missing out include Sunset Shores (Donkey Kong Country Returns), Emerald Coast (Sonic Adventure) and Dee Jay's Jamaican paradise in Super Street Fighter II.

Catching rays ends with Strawberry Beach by Jacek Yerka.

I give you FullMetal Alchemist and Madness

DS game based on the best selling anime.
One on one fighting spin-off to CPS II 3P scrolling mech monster Armored Warriors.
Now it's a five knuckle shuffle Full Metal machine.

Nice one Private Pyle and as a reward, feast on this jelly doughnut freshly pulled from Gunnery Sergeant Hartman's ass.

Sci-fi strategy from 1990.
In Seiken Densetsu 3 on Super Famicom, the curiously named crustacean boss Full Metal Hugger must be crushed.
Live. Die. Repeat.
Adapted from Horishi Sakurazaka's novel All You Need is Kill, Rita Vrataski (Emily Blunt) in Doug Liman's Edge of Tomorrow urges Tom Cruise's Major William Cage to 'find me when you wake up'.
Hey Punk! Are you tuff e nuff?


Okay, whatever.

Known as Dead Dance in Japan, this post apocalyptic fighting effort was one of the better Street Fighter II clones.
So 'tuff e nuff' is supposed to be a play on words of 'tough enough' and here's something crazier than a lorry load of psychos.

Excluding the obvious, clamping together this taunt forms part of the intro to 1995 Mega Drive boxing farce Toughman Contest which completely RIPS OFF Sega's 1992 arcade Title Fight.
I guess Visual Concepts were given permission.
Don't worry, I know all about Frank Bruno's Boxing ass raping Super Punch-Out!!

When you've fully recovered, enjoy this merry jape.

Using an archetypal visual gag, The Simpsons Movie had Homer temporarily stuck between a rock and a hard place.

Four down, nine to go.

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