Tuesday 22 September 2015

The Visit - The scoop and digest

Apart from The Sixth Sense and Unbreakable, M. Night Shyamalan has made a living from delivering inconsistent quality.

Oh yeah, After Earth was unbelievably boring and deservedly a box office flop.

Can we all agree Jaden Smith is an asshole?

Thanks in advance.

Could found footage be a genuine return to form or just another 'unnecessary' twist to the happy sack.

Plot details and/or spoilers span Monday to Friday

Making sense of it all:

Olivia DeJong - Becca
Ed Oxenbould - Tyler
Deanna Dunagan - Nana
Peter McRobbie - Pop Pop
Kathryn Hahn - Paula

While their mother Paula gets away from it all with her new bloke, siblings Tyler and Becca prepare to stay with grandparents Doris and John who they've never met before.

Failing to secure any details of argument fifteen years young, they decide to record events at rural farmhouse.

Pop Pop warns to never visit mould infested basement and bedtime is 9.30pm.

Taking a peek after curfew, Nana's behaviour includes projectile vomiting and clawing wall in the niff.

When challenged, Pop Pop claims she has a form of dementia known as sundowning, which compels strange activities after the hot orange thing in the sky hits the sack.

Our man is incontinent and after doing a present inside nappy, embarrassment is hidden inside barn.

Also, he mustn't be late for costume party and speaks of a strange creature.

At different periods, a woman and man visit who were helped by elderly in counselling.

When Becca puts Nana on the spot, infirm goes ape shit.

One night, the camera is left running downstairs and upon finding device, Nana grabs kitchen knife and unsuccessfully breaks into children's bedroom.

Seeking answers from Paula via Skype, she realises peeps aren't John and Doris.

Are kiddiewinks in mortal danger?

Possibly.

After viewing hanging corpses of visitors, Becca legs it to forbidden area and finds the bodies of real grandparents.

Oh, disheveled mental institution uniforms lay nearby.

Impostors: Less than meets the eye.
Impostors: Elderly in disguise.

For anybody who cares, I'm pretty sure secure unit is called Maple Leaf.

'Doris' and 'John' are killed by Becca and Tyler, via multiple stabbing and dispute with fridge door respectively.

In the pouring rain, (very strange), brother and sister are greeted by the clichéd arrival of Paula and law enforcement.

Mother finally reveals argument got physical and regrets of reconciliation never taking place.

"My sister insisted I included this part."

As credits roll, Tyler bizarrely raps the guts of ordeal.

What a great idea and oh fucking dear.

Comedy mystery smells worse than one of Pop Pop's nappies.

The twist is seen coming a country mile off and one-trick pony has surely shot his final bolt.

Anybody who doesn't agree are crazier than antagonists concerned.

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