Monday, 5 May 2014

Game Over Man! Top ten

Right ladies and gents, boys and girls - I present my top ten 'rewards' for failing in pixels.

As it has to be, in descending order - here goes.

Catherine, 2011 (PS3/360)
We go over Haunting Ground as the effect is virtually a carbon copy.

Although Vincent's nightmarish exploits was fairly original, I was never a fan but remember, sex sells...
Urban Strike, 1994 (Mega Drive)
The explosive reflection caps off a sorry situation.
Deadstorm Pirates, 2010 (Arcade)
Although attractive, Namco ought to be ashamed of this absolutely shameless steal of Sega's Let's Go Jungle.
Eternal Darkness: Sanity's Requiem, 2002 (Gamecube)
Fancy having your brain more scrambled than an egg?

I give you a classic from Silicon Knights.
Nam-1975, 1990 (Neo Geo)
Who knows what SNK were trying to suggest but if the unknown explanation isn't written on the card he's clutching, then I'll be a son of a good old-fashioned service revolver.
Operation Wolf, 1987 (Arcade)
Let me get this straight.

The punishment for running out of ammo is imprisonment, even though your itchy trigger finger (barring a terrible aim), has already wiped out x amount of enemy soldiers and vehicles.
Oh my God, that decision is genuinely funny.
Here's fun, what about immediate death by firing squad?
Castlevania: Dawn of Sorrow, 2005 (DS)
Konami have brought several goodies but this is definitely the best that Dracula's crypt has to offer.
Hexx: Heresy of the Wizard, 1994 (MS-DOS)
Thou art dead!
Although primarily a rip-off of Dungeon Master, Bloodwych was extremely successful.
What has that got to do with this?  Well it's because this grisly skeleton fails to disguise a later effort, minimally altered from Psygnosis.
You have sustained a lethal injury.  Sorry, but you are finished (pause) here.
Op Wolf's proper death screen is fairly dramatic but come on, his cap hasn't even come off.  Classic.
Customary drum roll please.

You knew what would reign supreme from the very off, didn't you?

No?  Well I don't believe you.  Ha ha.

Shadow of the Beast II, 1990 (Amiga)
Unlike the first, David Whittaker stepped aside and Tim Wright brilliantly exploited the responsibility of composing terrific melancholy to separate incredible frustration.

This is the ultimate personification of humiliation.
It's apparently a good fucking laugh to plagiarise Agony, as keyboardist Stian Aarstad of Norwegian band Dimmu Borgir and Sorgens Kammer demonstrated.  It was subsequently removed from the re-recording of album Stormblast.

Not stopping there, two wrongs took the piss as Alt Lys Er Svunnet Hen offensively shoplifted the intro from British band Magnum's Sacred Hour, that featured on album Chase the Dragon.

I don't like repeating myself but please search 'links' for many more cast iron examples in numerous forms.

So does anything (past or present), deserve to topple Beast II?

Whether you agree or disagree, I'd welcome any comments and/or feedback.

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