|Vortex must've been pretty desperate to slap Gort wannabe with company logo.|
"Klattu barada nikto."
Hey Helen, when I want your opinion, I'll ask for it.
|I'd rather bathe in acid than pledge allegiance to this.|
Hmmm, why is blood around mouth strategically 'smeared'?
|Survival of the shittest or survival of the fittest?|
The answer is sandwiched somewhere between hell and damnation.
|Take a sip of his secret potion, it'll make you look like shit. For a curse that can't be broken, one hit will be enough. For abuse turned up to three, here's the catastrophe, and it's called blank tragic (and it's called blank tragic).|
|Sex with rotten dick or plunging the depths of lesbian degradation?|
The decisions a girl has to make.
|Scarlet Salem's impressive chest fails to divert attention away from masterpiece knocked up in less time it takes the average hobo to finish taking a dump.|
|Frankenstein's Monster is given full mop of hair?|
That's dumber than sticking head inside the open jaws of sexually frustrated alligator and screaming 'SNAP'.
|Greasy hair, plastic body, fake tan, stock expression and unconvincing pointy stick?|
Yep, my sagacious character analysis confirms the presence of supreme ASSHOLE.
Don't be misled by American moniker - this is Barbarian: The Ultimate Warrior.
|Obnoxious smugness has made me puke my fucking guts out.|
With the Rocky theme tune? We couldn't give two Philadelphia fucks.
|The ineptitude of afterimage kick places strawberry on top of diarrhoea sundae.|
|If the legend of 'Nessie' really does look like artist's impression, hand me a 3.57 magnum.|
|Sheriff Burt Reynolds and um Big Cock.|
This is more Village People than Freddy's Revenge.
I'm off to strip joint for a proper piece of gash.
|Anybody who likes this belongs in a fucking asylum.|
|Fusing T-800 with vicious vampire?|
What a perverse fangtasy.
|I've seen jellies boast more rigidity than these brick shithouses. |
As for background, don't bother pushing the fucking boat out and make things a little more exciting - like adding spectators for instance.
|A guy fleeing from erupting volcano, black 'arrows' keen to point out 'something' and naval mine apparently emerging from non-reflective vortex for absolutely no reason?|
Definitely a lethal situation.
|Lee Wong was clean shaven and completely bald.|
Did artists research arcade's source material?
|Meet the result of mirrored distortion and Mr. Potato Head taking crystal meth.|
|Then porno superstar Jenna Jameson proudly presents a couple of shiny bald fellas.|
She starred alongside genre legend Robert Englund in Zombie Strippers!
|Another Master System triumph, which hurts the eyes (and the head).|
Rembrandt - eat your fucking palette out.