Wednesday, 26 August 2015

Sinister 2 - The scoop and digest

Ciaron Foy takes over directorial responsibility, but Scott Derrickson co-writes and helps produce.

In case you skipped previous meal, Babylonian deity Bughuul is affectionately known as 'the eater of children'.

Plot details and/or spoilers love to boogie.

(Sssshush), while the camera rolls for:

James Ransone - Ex-Deputy So & So
Shannyn Sossamon - Courtney
Dartanian Sloan - Zach
Robert Daniel Sloan - Dylan
Lea Coco - Clint

A family are strung up like scarecrows and burned alive in the centre of a corn field.

Quick, somebody call Taggart because there's been a murder.

Turns out wee lad Dylan was having a nightmare.

His mother Courtney and brother Zack reside at rural farmhouse, in homage to Stephen King's Children of the Corn.

After Dark Originals poorly remade 1988 gore classic Scarecrows as Husk in 2011.


Dylan is regularly visited by spectral children who insist watching snuff movies on 16mm (not super 8), will cease bad dreams.

Fishing Trip - alligator jaws snap shut.
Christmas Morning - shallow graves can be chilly.
Kitchen Remodel - flooded dining area is left in a shocking state.

So & So (now private investigator), burns down every house of horror (including Oswalt's residence) before keys can be handed over to the next sucker.

Remember, bad things only happen if you vacate property where murders took place.

Thanks in advance for letting me refer to nameless geezer as PI.

Attention abusive husbands, partners or boyfriends - you're all fucking cowards.

Falling under that category is hubby Clint, who turns up with a couple of uniforms to take custody of children.  However, having no means of legality forces a swift exit.

Milo shows Dylan how Sunday Service plays out.

Rats are trapped inside communion goblets and heated with hot coals, forcing rodents to munch their way out of respective abdomens.

Anybody with historical knowledge, and/or visited a decent dungeon will recognise this to be lifted from a popular form of Medieval torture.

Did any prisoner make it out alive?


On a lighter note, Basil caused widespread panic inside Farty Towels.

Untitled movie (household drill and dentistry) provides background noise, and because Dylan turns spoilsport - the window of opportunity opens for Zach...

An associate of the missing Professor Jonas comes into possession of a ham radio which in PI's presence, emits garbled frequencies.

Observance of violence?

Courtney and the children are forced to leave when Clint shows turns up with the necessary papers.

Uh oh! The chain has been broken.

Zach begins filming build-up, but Dylan manages to secretly text PI.

It seems brother's dream from opening sequence will become reality as Zach incinerates Clint.

Turning up in the nick of time cliché, PI hits Zach with off-road vehicle.

Shortly after, a determined Zach gives chase carrying a sickle.

Talk about making a speedy recovery.  Did Skynet send the bastard Terminator?

Ha ha ha!

Despite best endeavours to flush out Courtney and Dylan, Zach predictably doesn't complete family murder.

Bughuul condemns failure to ashes while remainder escape now burning house.

PI gathers belongings from motel room but uninvited ham radio begins to crackle, before Bughuul pops up to say hello.

This takes a giant dump on far superior original and one of the most ill conceived sequels ever.

Snuff fails to make skin crawl, story is dreadful and characters generally encourage nausea.

If the third revolves around Jonas, thematic staleness requires more than swift injection of unbridled menace.

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