Wednesday, 17 October 2012

If this isn't variety - you're predictably the greatest denier! Ud 29/01/13



During a lengthy debate, I had to occupy myself and this is the result.

I’m not quite sure how those who bear witness will react…

Some might say there is Things You Should Be Knowing.  The Cribs are an excellent starting point.

Shearwater displayed a surprising lack of Insolence.

After chewing over which mass of flowing water to dive in, White Denim noticed my confusion and offered to assist.  They pointed to that there was this River to Consider.

When listening to Wilco, I advise to always have an Open Mind.

Shoot the Water and Shoot the Runner are songs by Austra and Kasabian.

The Script saved For The First Time and U2 felt The First Time.

Muse are not just tough, they’re Invincible.

The Clash enjoyed Groovy Times and The Farm rode a Groovy Train.

Don’t rush me; I need to take a Second Look at The Soft Pack.

Switchfoot are bound to Thrive.

Shinedown offer the Sound of Madness.

Justice is under suitable Stress.

I forsee an Apocolips.  What?  Surely that’s ‘Apocalypse’.  Well, not according to Turin Brakes. It's okay though as Apocalypse Please is a Muse song.

It appears that Elbow like nothing more than to throw a Snowball.

The Raveonettes are Sleepwalking and La Sera are Sleeptalking.

Tindersticks are Waiting for the Moon, The Velvet Underground are Waiting for the Man and Nelly Furtado is Waiting for the Night.

Starsailor were caught up In the Crossfire and Brandon Flowers did well to avoid a Crossfire.

Warpaint and Deep Purple are hiding in Shadows, Puressence were Standing in your Shadow, Keane observed My Shadow and Ocean Colour Scene is fussy over It's My Shadow

I can give a fascinating Insight into Joy Division.

I don’t know why but Muse are Feeling Good.

I’m waiting for Kula Shaker to send the Cavalry.

Passion Pit will Make Light of any situation.

There is a Light that Never Goes Out, The Lights Went Out and Music When the Lights Go Out are songs by The Smiths, The Cribs and The Libertines respectively.

Theory of a Deadman don’t have a Leg to Stand On.

Everybody has a Cross to Bear and I guess Tricky is mine.

Massive Attack were arrested for a minor offence.  They weren’t charged but did have their Name Taken.

If I’m listening to White Denim and happen to be chased by a wild and rabid animal, I Start to Run.

Falling in Reverse asked me to take the blood-sucking test of sunlight, being doused with holy water and coming into contact with garlic.  After failing each test and before a stake through the heart, I guess I’m Not a Vampire.

To avoid being blown to smithereens, Biffy Clyro advises to Know your Quarry.

If It Wasn’t For Me, The Courteeners wouldn't be where they are now.

Luno is a Bloc Party track and Juno is a 2007 film.

Vampire Weekend is a band.  If I’m wrong, then I Stand Corrected.

The Devil Inside, The Evil Inside, The Man Inside and The Dead Inside are all films.  The Ghost Inside and The War Inside are songs by Broken Bells and Switchfoot respectively.

My burger van was packing up due to loss of electricity.  The Holloways were gagging for some healthy food so I borrowed their Generator.

It’s unadvisable to look down The Chamber of a gun owned by The Last Shadow Puppets as it might be loaded…

Fire in my Heart, Here in my Heart and Wound in my Heart are songs by Super Furry Animals, Ocean Colour Scene and Propaganda respectively.

For all dog lovers, which of the following terms can you associate with The Fiery Furnaces? Is it bark bark, woof woof or Bow Wow?

Not too difficult really.

When a Killer Calls and When a Stranger Calls are both films.

Dirty Pretty Things emigrated because they were Tired of England.

Shearwater is an Immaculate band.

I don't know about you but I hope Kaiser Chiefs decide to prolong their Retirement.

The world should know that American Pie is a famous teen sex comedy franchise and American Idiot is an album from Green Day.

American Beauty, American Psycho, American Balls, American Evil, American Gothic, American Gangster, American Ninja, American Graffiti and American Mary are all standalone films.

Noah and the Whale are rebuilding My Broken Heart and James Vincent McMorrow is Breaking Hearts.

The Raveonettes made many Observations and Observe and Report is not one of Seth Rogen’s best films.

Blown Away and Get Blown Away are songs by Pixies and Ocean Colour Scene respectively.

Lanterns on the Lake have I Love You, Sleepyhead Passion Pit are a Sleepyhead and Blind Melon rest in a Sleepyhouse.

Neutral Milk Hotel were nervous to hear about their exam results.  What a relief it was when the brilliant sound of You’ve Passed was issued to them.

There are many types of oranges but The Decemberists will only eat the Clementine variety.

Analyze Me and Analyze This is a Tricky song and film starring Billy Crystal and Robert De Niro respectively.

The sequel Analyse That was pretty poor.

La Sera were finally granted permission for Lift Off.

How can anybody like Coldplay?  Sorry, that’s pretty Twisted Logic.

It’s difficult to avoid Animal Collective and Bees.  They just go together so well.

“Hello, can I speak to The Subways please?”

There’s a slight pause and I was asked, not how you got this number but instead;

“It’s possible and for what particular reason?”

“Well yeah, I’d like to book a Holiday.”

She promptly hung up on me and before I accused her of rudeness, the company policy did read that they offer No Goodbyes.

The Wedding Present will Shake It, Wilco attempted to Shake it Off, Florence + the Machine will Shake it Out and Matthew Dear tried to Shake Me.

The Horrors became a Mirror’s Image and Mirror’s Edge is a PS3 game.

I can hardly watch as Doves took a Pounding.

The Hunt is a song by Grizzly Bears and In the Hunt is a 1993 Irem shmup.

Hot Chip will Arrest Yourself and Elbow will commonly Forget Myself.

I spent a Weekend in Brooklyn with Kisses.

Whatever Happened to the Likely Lads? and What Became of the Likely Lads is a classic 1970s sitcom and a song by The Libertines respectively.

James are Born of Frustration and Soft Cell felt the Frustration.

Seven whatever in songs...

Months – Portishead
Nation Army – The White Stripes
Years of Letters – The Twilight Sad
Seas – Echo & the Bunnymen
Devils – Florence + the Machine
Years – Norah Jones
Days in the Sun – Feeder
Bridges Road – The Eagles
Days - Show of Hands
Seas of Rhye – Queen
Years of Holidays – The Walkmen
Hills - While She Sleeps
Is a Jolly Good Time – The Egg
Curses - Show of Hands
Naked Valleys - Graham Coxon
Cities of Gold - Rush
Caged Tigers - Stone Temple Pilots

Seven Psychopaths is a comedy film with an very impressive cast including Colin Farrell, Christopher Walken, Woody Harrelson and Sam Rockwell.  Abbie Cornish provides the necessary eye candy... 

Add a little Sparkle to your life with No Doubt.

I created a Snow Angel with Tori Amos.

A guy’s head suddenly ignited in flames, he was understandably in need of a bucket of water.  Broken Bells really made him feel better as they calmly pointed out Your Head is on Fire.

If you Like it Too Much, you must wean yourself off Kaiser Chiefs.

Paul Weller struggles to turn on the waterworks in even the most emotional and sad situations as he has No Tears to Cry.

Counting Days is a song by Wild Nothing and Counting Crows is a band.

Up! and Up are two different films.  That ‘!’ has never been so important.

Axe and Axed are both films.

Saturn 3 is a 1980 film and Saturn 5 is a song by Inspiral Carpets.

Animal Collective take great care of the Grass in their garden.

Boys Who Rape (Should All Be Destroyed).  The Raveonettes are quite right.

Boat Trip and Road Trip are both films.

Lanterns on the Lake sail Ships in the Rain and Fiery Furnaces will do anything, Even in the Rain.

Kill List, Kill Shot, Kill Speed, Kill Bill, Kill Keith, Kill Zone and Kill Switch are all films.

If I don’t listen to Paradise Lost, it will be my Last Regret and my Last Request will be Paolo Nutini.

The Cure, Elbow, Nickelback and The Courteeners will sing you a Lullaby, Bombay Bicycle Club will share a Fairytale Lullaby and Queens of the Stone Age will explain This Lullaby.

Super Furry Animals are more of a convenience, rather than an Inconvenience.

Kings of Leon are a Soft band.

I was lost in a challenging maze but Tindersticks was my serendipity as If You’re Looking For a Way Out, follow this path.

I guarantee you will Change Your Mind about The Killers.

I could listen to Hot Chip not once but Over and Over.

Do you want the bad news or The Bad Thing?  Arctic Monkeys will explain the latter.

Muse live in a City of Delusion.

Red Hot Chili Peppers can Suck my Kiss and Arctic Monkeys will Suck It and See.

I don’t believe that Evanescence and New Order are capable of committing Murder but Low is a Murderer.  The Hoosier threaten to unleash a Killer.

Forgotten Faces, Forgotten Works and Forgotten Ground are tracks by Avenged Sevenfold, Klaxons and Levellers respectively.  Forgotten Worlds is 1988 Capcom action game.

Finally, TV on the Radio are easily Forgotten.

Bucket List is a Nelly Furtado song and The Bucket List is a heart-warming 2007 film starring Morgan Freeman and Jack Nicholson. 

Tori Amos can be so Cruel.

Mansun occupy a Wide Open Space, Robbie Williams is Advertising Space and Air Traffic is part of Empty Space.

Wargames is a famous 1983 Matthew Broderick movie and War Games is a 2011 horror film.

If a Miracle happens, you can bet that Shinedown, The Foo Fighters and The Temper Trap are part of it.  All the Young experienced Another Miracle

I have to ask Gene this question, Where Are They Now?

Concerts hosted by Ariel Pink’s Haunted Graffiti should not be seen by children, killjoys or those of a nervous disposition as they are likely to feature Mature Themes.

Only a Northern Song and A Northern Soul are songs by The Beatles and The Verve.

I’m hungry Tricky, please; I’m begging you – just Feed Me.

The Killers and Goldfrapp are Human and The Young Knives are Human Again.

I bet Stereophonics get bored pretty quickly in their Goldfish Bowl.

Satellite and Satellite of Love are songs by Depeche Mode and Lou Reed respectively.

Above Ian Brown are Northern Lights and Detroit Social Club are made of a Northern Man.

The Ataris are Not Capable of Love and Dexys are Incapable of Love.

Here Comes the Breeze and Here Comes the Sun are songs by Gomez and The Beatles respectively.

A Fistful of Peanuts and A Fistful of Dollars is a song by Gorrilaz and a classic Clint Eastwood spaghetti western respectively.

Leaving Las Vegas, Fear and Loathing Las Vegas and What Happens in Vegas are all completely different types of films.  Waking Up in Vegas is a Katy Perry song and Vegas is a song by Sleeper.

The Leisure Society visited The Darkest Place I Know.

Chief Medical Officers’ warn that listening to The Czars have unforeseen Side Effects.

Woman in Chains is a song by Tears for Fears and Alice in Chains is a band.  Alice in Vain is a song from Sleeper.

Death Note is a Manga action mystery and Death Letter is a song by the White Stripes.

Hot Chip consumed one too many and therefore were told they are in No Fit State to drive.

The Wombats visited Patricia the Stripper and Mansun know a Stripper Vicar.

A man wanted to go one step further than a cuddle with his girlfriend.  She spurned his advances that left the male dejected; I guess she’s Not Ready Yet.  Well, her favourite band was Eels.

I never listen to Muse while I’m Sober.

I Wonder and No Wonder are songs by Blind Melon and Neil Young respectively.

All I Know is that somebody may like Screaming Trees.

The Chap are going to a Better Place.

I urge Echo & the Bunnymen to display a Show of Strength.

If you want to vent your Anger at something, talk to The Czars and not to me.

It’s a Disaster and Walking Disasters are songs by Ok Go and The Wombats respectively.

The Young Knives are blessed with a Silver Tongue and Jenny Lewis owns an Acid Tongue.

The Besnard Lakes caused a Disaster and Electric Presidents created Elegant Disasters.

I lost my Keys the other day but it was no drama as White Denim has a spare set.

Apartment 143 and Apartment 1303 are both films.

Children of the Sun, Children of the Revolution, Children of the Grounds and Children of the Moon are songs by Feeder, T-Rex, Midlake and The Flaming Lips respectively.

To finish up, Children of the Corn is a 1984 horror film based on the short by Stephen King.

Siva and Shiva are songs by The Smashing Pumpkins and The Antlers respectively.

Before I Die, We Are the Ocean is on my playlist.

The Smashing Pumpkins may struggle to look into my Eye.

I don’t want I am Kloot to ever Stop.

Pixies got me into a Gigantic mess.

If you won’t listen to Hole, you are pretty Gutless.

The Vaccines were Under your Thumb and The Rolling Stones are Under my Thumb.

The Twilight Sad felt the draught resulting from Cold Days from the Birdhouse and They Might Be Giants made a little Birdhouse in your Soul.

Slow Club never forget to walk The Dog.

I don’t think anybody can appreciate the immense Pressure that Paramore and The Czars are under.

Sleigh Bells gave up gambling as they were Born to Lose.

Attention all explorers, if you fancy reading the newspaper – subscribe to Eels as they will happily deliver the Jungle Telegraph.

My Last Breath and Last Breath is a song by Evanescence and a terrible horror film respectively.

The Futureheads have no problem getting from A to B.

The Czars aren’t getting Any Younger.

After singing The Maccabees on karaoke, I developed a Sore Throat.

The Pigeon Detectives insist you Say It Like you Mean It and The Killers ask you to Smile Like you Mean It.

Oh Collector and Oh Comely are songs by Ocean Colour Scene and Neutral Milk Hotel respectively.

The Hoosiers needn’t worry about a tailor as each suit is Made to Measure.

Juarez and Call of Juarez is song by We Are Augustines and a video game series respectively.

A hooker may have seen a cockatoo.  The Egg have changed a Bulb, or two.

Trust Me, you must believe in The Fray but The Bluetones Can’t be Trusted.

Kaiser Chiefs have only told you Half the Truth and The Last Shadow Puppets will tell Only the Truth.

Swans are a band of complete Lunacy.

Begging and Begging You are songs by The Libertines and The Stone Roses respectively.

Of the four seasons, The Czars most look forward to Autumn.

Cerulean and Herculean are songs by Simian Mobile Disco and The Good, the Bad & the Queen respectively.

Serpent is a song by Actress and The Serpent is a 2006 film.

Megablast is a 1989 Taito arcade shmup and Megablast is also the subtitle of the 1989 Amiga classic Xenon 2 by The Bitmap Brothers.

The Last Dance, Save the Last Dance and One Last Dance is a Within Temptation song, a 2001 film and a Badly Drawn Boy song respectively.

Space Cowboy, Space Shanty, Space Dementia, Space Rock, Space Girl and Space Clothes are songs by Jamiroquai, Leftfield, Muse, Weezer, The Imagined Village and Wooden Shjips respectively.

No matter how I listen, I still Don’t Understand the music that Low produce.

Marathon Man, Mercury Man and Mario Man are songs by Ian Brown, Animal Collective and Super Furry Animals respectively.

Imagine if you met a Girl Named Hello.  Imagine how irritating it would be?  I mean, every time you rang her she’d answer with her own name.  If somebody answered the phone and she was in the room, she’d think you were talking to her.  The confusion would never end.

Anyway, spare a thought for Of Montreal.

I fail to understand why The Human League cannot hear The Sound of the Crowd.

A Song For... is by Get Cape. Wear Cape. Fly and Song for Whoever is by The Beautiful South.

The National and their music Lit Up a miserable night.

Sexy Sadie and Little Sadie are songs by The Beatles and Mark Lanegan respectively.

I’m starting to feel that Wilco have a disliking to their new recording studio as they frequently say they Hate it Here.

Demon Days and Demon Eyes are songs by Gorillaz and The Answer.

If you fancy a different challenge, why not join Dream Theater and build Bridges in the Sky.

The Gaslight Anthem is Handwritten and White Denim has a particular style of Handwriting.

Extraordinary, Extreme and Desperate Measures are all films.

I observed a Glint in the eye of Actress.

The most striking thing about Owl City concert is the way their Silhouette is cast amongst the stage.

On the Ropes is an expression in sport which your opponent senses you’re practically beaten.  The Wonder Stuff are more than aware of this.

Animal Collective grow tired of their Daily Routine.

I was chewing the fat with Mindless Self Indulgence and somebody stated that Highlander II: The Quickening was actually a good sequel and film.  This is of course, Bullshit.

Lost Myself and Forget Myself are songs by Longpigs and Elbow respectively.

When I go for a dip at the swimming baths, I find myself strangely Drawn to the Deep End.  Gene is also Fighting Fit....

Whatever Gets You Through the Night and Whatever Hurts You Through the Night are songs by John Lennon and Glasvegas respectively.  Whatever Gets You Through the Day is an album the Lighthouse Family.

The Libertines hosted a concert.  I wasn’t there but I was told it was a Horror Show.

The Hoosiers asked Who Said Anything (About Falling in Love)? and Buzzcocks had a hit with Ever Fallen in Love (With Someone You Shouldn’t’ve).

Take a Chance on Us and Take a Chance on Me are songs by Scouting for Girls and ABBA respectively.

After receiving some good news, Evanescence are on Cloud Nine.

Instant Karma is a 1970 John Lennon song, Sweet Karma and Bad Karma are films released in 2009 and 2012 respectively.

Chapterhouse taunted their music rivals with If You Want Me, you know where you can find me.  The Human League frequently ask Don't You Want Me.

After years of using a hammer to be free from a manacle, Wild Nothing accepted that This Chain Won’t Break.

Interpol built a sturdy Barricade to prevent access by unwanted parties.

I’m hypnotised by the Golden Pendulum swung by The Big Pink.

The Drums read a Book of Revelation and We Are Augustines opened the Book of James.

You have Five Seconds to decide if you want to listen to Twin Shadow.

Animal Collective aren’t very good detectives as they have Unsolved Mysteries to well, solve.

Terrorvision have an album called How to Make Friends and Influence People released in 1994.  How to Lose Friends and Alienate People is an awful 2008 comedy film starring Simon Pegg.  

See that striking coincidence in each title?

Hot Chip tried to Arrest Yourself and Gomez were intent on Get Myself Arrested.

Why are you listening to The Fray?
Errr, why not?
No reason, but at this Ungodly Hour?

I will hear Owl City across many Galaxies.

Bombay Bicycle Club is the Jewel in my crown and The Coral own a Roving Jewel.

Like Two Door Cinema Club, I was waiting for a pint to Settle.  No Doubt are looking to finally Settle Down.

Calvin Harris found a new super hero in Electro Man.

I will take Solarstone via Intravenous injection.

Kid 2000 and Disco 2000 are songs by Hybrid and Pulp respectively.

The Temper Trap took a well deserved Rest.

Wild Nothing can be seen only Through the Glass.

I had a nasty cough so I borrowed some Cough Syrup from Young the Giant.

Howler is very interested in the Back of Your Neck.

The Xx heard that my Heart Skipped a Beat, Kaiser Chiefs will Never Miss a Beat and Toy appreciate My Heart Skips a Beat.

Auf Wiedersehen Pet is a classic comedy show with Jimmy Nail, Tim Healy et al about a bunch of Geordie brickies.  Auf Wiedersehen Goodbye is a song by Future of the Left.

Maximo Park noted that The Kids are Sick Again and The Twilight Sad are just Sick.

Light Pollution knew Drunk Kids and MGMT and Robbie Williams had Kids.

LCD Soundsystem hung out with Drunk Girls and Ed Sheeran went out and got Drunk.

Crazy Eights, Page Eight, Hard Eight and Super 8 are all films.

If you lock Horns with Gossip, I have no idea of the outcome.

I promised not to listen to Skunk Anansie but couldn’t help it.  I guess that was pretty Weak of me.

Those who experience freezing while working on a computer can see the unwanted presence of an Hourglass.  For The Bees, it’s essential.

Blur will stay To the End, The Raveonettes are here Till the End and The Magnetic Fields will fight Till the Bitter End

With security guards blowing and an unreliable police response, All the Young gave Chase in pursuit of a shoplifter.

Wearing gloves is a technique often employed by burglars as it tends not to leave Fingerprints.  I am Kloot are obviously inexperienced thieves.

With work so hard to come by, Talking Heads proved becoming employed is possible as they eventually Found a Job, The Offspring queried Why Don't You Get a Job? and Employment is a Kaiser Chiefs album.

Lana Del Ray knew a Million Dollar Man and Million Dollar Baby is a Clint Eastwood boxing film with Hilary Swank.

I only listen to Massive Attack in very Special Cases.

Arsonists may like to watch things Burn.  Admiral Fallow cannot be trusted with matches.

The debate was over and those who managed to stay were particularly excited by my choice of subject matter.

They asked for an encore and I left by giving a sincere acknowledgement that their wish is my command.

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