Thursday, 14 March 2013

Video game sleeve art comparison - Strike 2

Here we go again thrill seekers.

I decided against consigning some of these to the 'awful' archives and suitable opinion won't need a push from a barge pole...

Many countries will be explored and you're gonna love it.

I wish not to overload your Virtual Memory but just to make it work a tad harder than usual.

Hmmm, this particular design reminds me of...
...2000 AD's Strontiom Dog

Meet Ralf (before he successfully auditioned to appear in The King of Fighters), so where is Clark?  Imprisoned in a P.O.W. camp?
Ralf and Clark are two highly trained 'fuck with me and you'll die' full blooded combat soldiers so why are they portrayed to be more immature than most shoe sizes?  Oh, this is hardly the time to try and 'drink' a grenade.
This is where matters get quite ludicrous.  Ralf and Clark are distinguished by red and blue headbands respectively, so take a wild guess in what the immediate problem is here?
Young man, the situation is clear, I said young man, why the hell are you here, with that God awwww-ffffuuuu-llllI moustache.  You've gotta say whaaaat the fuuu-ccck, I say aggggaaaaiiiin, ohhhh what the fuuu-ccck?  (You can all stop singing now)...
Arrrrrggggghhhhhh!  Yeah, c'mon you bastards, I don't need bullets because I have a sword.   Anyway, at least the headbands are back.
The shit concludes with stiff kick and blue lycra. 
Yes solider, destroy the enemy army and any other form of victory is punishable by death.
Hmmm, I think this zombie solider needs a bit of time in the sun...
Incredibly, this one is quite decent.

Re: Bionic Commado, some of the art suggests the game should be known as Human Commando.

The infamous Billy Bullshit would be proud of this foul smelling excrement.  
At least the artist had the balls in knowing that goat chops actually existed in the game.

It's true what they say about war, hand a guy a flamethrower and he becomes a lunatic.
I hope some sniper tags his ass...
Judging by the perspective of this xenomorph, it must be at least a 1000 feet tall.
How can a converted fire hose be of any help apart from when things get a little heated?
It appears the female's eye piece needs re-positioning...
Hey alien monstrosity, talk to the hand...
No wonder this beast looks depressed...

I suppose this is acceptable rather than atrocious. 
Taking a brief glance at this terrible cover art should immediately scream this was ripped from an iconic scene in cinema history. 
Dallas (Tom Skerritt) finds that refusing the invitation of a cuddle from the now fully grown alien is literally the last thing he'll ever do...  No blood, no Dallas, nothing!
More washing will be hung out to dry at a later date...

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